UPJOKE

Newly Married Couple Jokes

A newly married couple

A newly married couple make their way to bed and everything is going well until...

"Ooh! Oh! Look at that! What's wrong with it?" cries the bride.

"It's just my junk!" says the groom, offended.

"Yes, but's what's wrong with it? They're not supposed to look like that! It's all tw...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A newly married couple visit a doctor.

The doctors asks, "What's the problem?"

Husband replies, "There is a bee stuck in my wife's vagina."

Doctor asks, "How the hell did it get in there??"

Husband, "I'm not sure, but maybe one of the bees, from the beehive right next to our house, happened to get in there, when my w...

Newly Married Couple from honeymoon

A newly-married couple came home from their honeymoon and moved into the upstairs apartment they'd rented from the groom's parents.

That night, the father of the groom was awakened from his sleep by his wife.

"Tony, listen!" she whispered. He listened. Upstairs, the bed was creaking in...

Newly married couple.

A newly married Texan couple are in bed for the first time.

The girl who is a reserved Christian goes, "What is that thing?"

"That's my rope." The husband replies proudly.

"And what's beneath that?"

"Them's me knots."

And then they go on to make love.
During w...

Newly married couple ..

A new bride is being driven home in a buggy by her new husband, and the horse stumbles. The husband gets off and whips the horse and says "That's 1!"

He climbs back and they continue. A mile later the horse stumbles again and the husband gets off again and whips the horse again and says "Tha...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A newly married couple...

are having sex in an old, flat tombstone, cemetery. The next day, the woman complains of back problems and goes to see a doctor. The doctor asks "How old are you?
She replies "27, why?
"No reason, it says on your ass you died in 1798"

A newly married couple is driving the back roads in Arkansas and needed to stop for gas

They happened upon a small gas station. As they went to pay for the gas they noticed an older Native American man sitting by the door.
Just being a little silly the husband says "Howgh", and raises his hand in the air. The older man nods.
Inside the gas station they ask the teller about th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A newly married couple is about to have sex for the first time...

The husband says "What kind of woman are you? No naval, no breasts..."

The wife says "Get off my back."

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