UPJOKE

It's the little things that count

It's true, I have a friend who is 3 feet tall and he's a really good mathemetician.

My dad told me to make little things count

That's why I'm teaching maths to dwarfs

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"I've come to appreciate the little things in life"

- My wife, talking about my penis

Happiness is in the little things

So my wife is such a happy woman

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My wife is very fond of saying "It's the little things in life..."

I just wish she wouldn't say it after sex

It's the little things in a marriage.

A guy is out with his buddies. He has a few drinks, gets in the mood but true to his wife goes home.

When he gets home he finds her sound asleep in bed with her mouth wide open. He gets two aspirin and drops them into
her mouth.

Of course, she chokes but recovers and asks, "What d...

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I always wondered why my gf brings cake and confetti when we have sex....

Turns out she likes to celebrate the little things.

"I find pleasure in the little things"...

...Said the pedofile to the court.

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I told my wife that she needs find joy in the little things in life.

She replied, “honey, I am not in the mood right now for sex.”

Although "Appreciate the little things" is good life advice,

It's not something to say in bed.

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My psychiatrist told me that I should stop worrying and start enjoying little things in my life.

Now I play with my dick everyday.

For her birthday I bought my wife new beads for her abacus.

It's the little things that count.

I need a girl that appreciates the little things.

So when I take my pants off she will be excited.

People always say, "Its the little things in life you treasure"...

But whenever I'm naked, girls always laugh.

A multimillionaire goes to a psychologist [OC]

So, the multimillionaire is lying there on the couch, and he says, "I have this problem where I buy things. Big things, little things. It doesn't matter if it's a good deal or not. It doesn't matter whether or not I need it. It's the thrill of the purchase. In fact, yesterday I pulled out my wa...

Harry Potter just released a new figure of its leading hero Mr. Scamander. But it isn’t very good the shirt is the wrong color, the scarf is too short, the nose is to long, and a bunch of other little things are wrong.

Did they really think I wouldn’t notice all these wrong My Newt details?

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