UPJOKE

L P Jokes

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N V B K I T H E K L O P F

I N V E N T O R Z S F O F

T H E E F G H J I O L P L

Y Q W O R D S E A R C H

H A S J P O D I E D G W

My local public swimming pool had a big sign on the wall.

It said: “Welcome To Our OOL. Notice there no ‘P’ in it? Let’s keep it that way.”

I always thought it was a pity that they never had a sign that said “Welcome To Our L …”

READ THESE LETTERS IN ENGLISH FOR FUNNY PHRASE IN SPANISH

2 T N S L P P B N T S O

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

MATHEMATICAL ANALYSIS OF 100%

What makes life 100%??
Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?
We have all been to those meetings where someone wants over 100%.
How about achieving 103%? Here's a little math that might prove helpful.

What makes life 100%?

If A B C D E F G ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man goes to see a doctor about his stuttering problem.

The doctor enters the exam room and says "Good afternoon! What seems to be the problem?"

"Ww... wwh... well," says the man, "I ha... have have thissss... t.. t... terrible stutter alm...most mh... mh... mh... my wh... who.... whole l.. life. P..P..People make... fu...fu..fun of me. I ca.. ca....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Black Testicles

Black Testicles
A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen
mask over his mouth and nose, still heavily sedated from a difficult
four hour, surgical procedure.
A young student nurse appears to give him a partial sponge bath.
'Nurse', he mumbles, from behind the...

Little Johnny is at Sunday school.

Johnny : Miss, please can I go to the toilet?

Teacher : Okay, but first you must answer a question. How do you spell psalm?

Johnny : S A L M

Teacher : Close, but you forgot about the silent P.

Johnny : I didn't miss, I can feel it trickling down my leg.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Almost...

The kindergarten teacher is warned about little Johnny’s vulgar mouth. He uses any excuse to say a bad word.

The teacher announces, “Class, today we are going to work on our alphabet. Who can spell a simple word that starts with ‘A’?”

Little Johnny’s hand shoots up. “Oh! Oh! Pick me...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So me and this girl have been getting together pretty regularly to play Scrabble on the weekends...

...the other day we decided to meet at a bar after work and I made a joke about how it's too bad we can't play Scrabble in the bar, hoping she'd say, "We can still play Scrabble on our cellphones!" because everybody knows about those Scrabble apps, right? (Man, I could really go for a good game of S...

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