UPJOKE

Jewish Mothers Jokes

Jewish mothers, right?

The year is 2028 and the United States has elected the first woman as well as the first Jewish president, Sarah Goldstein.
She calls up her mother a few weeks after Election Day and says, "So, Mom, I assume you'll be coming to my inauguration?"
"I don't think so. It's a ten-hour drive, your fa...

Jewish mothers are like parole officers

They never let anybody finish a sentence.

A waiter checks on a table of Jewish mothers and asks:

Is anything ok?

How many Jewish Mothers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Oh don't worry about me I'll just sit here in the dark. It's not like I need light to sit here all alone by myself.

Three Jewish Mothers

Three Jewish mothers are sitting on a park bench in Miami Beach talking about (what else?) how much their sons love them.

Sadie says "You know the Chagall painting hanging in my living room? My son, Arnold, bought that for me for my 75th birthday. What a good boy he is and how much he loves h...

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Two Jewish mothers are talking and one says

Two Jewish mothers are talking and one says, "I have some unsavory news. I sent my son to Israel to become a more faithful Jew, but he became Christian!"

The other mother replies, "Funny story! I sent my son there for the same reason, and he became a Christian as well!"

The two women, ...

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What did the waiter ask the group of dining Jewish mothers?

"Pardon me ladies, but is ANYTHING all right?"


(Shabbat Shalom my fellow Jews of the Jokes sub!)

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What do you get when 500 Jewish mothers convert to Catholicism?

Critical Mass.

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Two Jewish Mothers Talking About Their Sons...

...And one of them says "I sent my son to Israel and he has come back a Christian."

The other Jewish mother listens, thinks for a moment and says, "That's odd. I sent my son to Israel and he returned as a Christian."

So the two of them went to see the Rabbi. They told the Rabbi the sto...

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One of my favorite jew jokes.

3 Jewish mothers get together for lunch one day at a fancy restaurant on the upper east side in Manhattan. They haven't seen each other in years, so the conversation naturally, turns to their sons. The first one says, "My Moishe...he's the best doctor in all of New York. Celebrities see him. Michael...

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