UPJOKE

I L Jokes

I lost three fingers on my right hand, so l asked my doctor if I would still be able to write with it

The doctor said, "Maybe, but I wouldn't count on it."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I like me women how l like my wine.

12 years old and locked in my basement.

I like working in hotels that label the ground floor L for lobby.

If a guest has a complaint, I can tell them to go to L.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What’s green and has wheels?

Grass. I lied about the wheels.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man goes to the Council to apply for a job

The interviewer asks him, ''Are you allergic to anything?''


He replies, "Yes, caffeine. I can't drink coffee.''


''OK, have you ever been in the military
service?''


he says, ''l was in Iraq for one tour.''
The interviewer says, ''That will give you 5
ex...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A joke my Uncle tells. Makes me laugh every time..

Somewhere deep down south a man dials 9-1-1..

Operator: “Emergency services. Is there a problem?”

Man: “Hi, uhh ya. I jus’ came home and I foun’ my wife lyin’ dead on tha floor.”

Operator: “I am so sorry to hear that sir. How would you like us to assist you?”

Man: “Yea, u...

Nine Words

Once upon a time, long before any type of writing or sign language there lived an attractive young prince.

This prince, through no fault of his own, was cursed by a witch such that he was only allowed to say one word per year.

Fortunately, however, he WAS allowed to save up his words.<...

Everybody Knows Somebody Called DAVE.

Dave is an advertising executive in L.A., who is always boasting that he knows EVERYONE on the planet, & they all know him.

His colleagues love hearing his stories about this celebrity, or that politician. However, his boss doesn't believe a word & challenges him to prove his boasts....

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