At first dates, every woman I ask says they're a "glass half full person...
But when I tell them I was talking about my dick, suddenly 3 inches means their glasses are all half empty
People are always saying, is the glass half full or empty..
Who cares....there's room for some vodka.. who all wants some?
A pessimist sees the glass half empty; an optimist see the glass half full.
Dave: (reading) a pessimist sees the glass half empty; an optimist see the glass half full.
Wife: [returning from the kids room] why is half my soda gone?
Dave: because you’re a pessimist.
People are complaining about this being the hottest summer in the last 150 years.
I'm more of a glass half full kind of guy,
I'm thinking of it as the coldest summer in the next 150 years!
A blonde walks into a blind date
“Nice to meet you” she says to her date as they seat themselves in the booth
“So tell me about yourself. What do you do for work?” She asks the man
“Oh I’m an optometrist” he replies
The blonde flashes a big smile and says “I think this is going to work out after all, I’m a gl...
What do you call an optimistic programmer?
A glass half full stack developer.
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