UPJOKE
tommy leefred durstlil' kimgeorge clintonbeastie boysmix master mikereggae

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Young Virgin Couple

A young virgin couple are finally wed. Each one is nervous about the impending night, but neither are willing to admit or ask each other about it.

Wondering what to do first, the young man calls his father.

"Pop, what do I do first?"

"Get naked and climb into bed," his father...

When I get naked in the bathroom..

The shower usually gets turned on.

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2 college students accidentally miss the math final exam

The next day they both went to plead with their
professor. He was feeling pretty good that day so he allowed them to retake it. He told them to both come back tomorrow for an oral exam. When they both showed up he told one of them to wait outside while he tests the other. So one enters and the ot...

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My uncle once told me to go to the basement and get Naked,

I asked him whether he wanted Mighty Mango or Berry Blast.

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Before sex, you help each other get naked. After sex, you dress only yourself.

Moral: In life no one helps you once you're screwed.

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69 joke

A married couple where the woman is more sexually experienced than the husband, likes to try new things regularly. One day the woman comes home and says “today we’re going to try 69”. The husband asks “what’s that?”. The wife says “don’t worry about it, just do what I say and it will be great!”. She...

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I think it's bullcrap how Miley Cyrus can get naked, lick a sledge hammer, and people call it "art" and "music".

Yet when I do it, I'm "wasted" and " have to leave Home Depot".

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Everyone knows that girls don’t poop, but I’m starting to think they don’t get naked too

I don’t know about you but I’ve never seen one

An elderly couple was sitting at the kitchen table on the morning of their50th wedding anniversary.”You know,” she said, “We were probably sitting in the kitchen across fromeach other 50 years ago.”

“Yeah,” he said, “But we were probably naked.”


"So let’s get naked now,” she suggested.So they both took off all their clothes and sat across from each other.


“You know,” she said smiling lovingly, “My nipples feel just as hot lookingat you today as they did 50 years ago.”
<...

A young bride is in bed with her husband for the first time.

When they get naked she notices that he has a club foot. Nervously she leaves the room and calls her mother.

“Mom, Frank has a foot and a half.”

The mom responds, “I’ll be right there. This sounds like a job for momma!”

Sam: Hey Dave, I saw something really weird last night in the woods.

Dave: Oh yeah? What’d you see?

Sam: We’ll it’s kinda hard to explain, except it looked like a group of older women gathered around a fire, doing these weird chants and they started to get naked.. I mean that could only mean one thing..

Dave: Which is?

Sam: Exactly

An old couple gets in the mood.

There was this couple who had been married for 50 years. They were sitting at the breakfast table one morning when the old gentleman said to his wife, "Just think, honey, we've been married for 50 years."

"Yeah," she replied, "Just think, fifty years ago we were sitting here at this breakfas...

New job needed

Went to work today at the bank and immediately got called up to h.r. department. H.r. admin asked why I'm at work and naked. I explained that my gf came in to the room this morning without any clothes on and told me to get naked and get to work.

Anyone hiring?

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