UPJOKE

Friend Died Jokes

My Korean friend died yesterday

So Yung...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My friend died of a heart attack while having sex with his wife

At least he died doing what he loved.

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My friend died of an overdose of Viagra.

Took them 2 days to shut the coffin lid..

The other day, my friend died of heartburn

I can’t believe Gav is gone

My friend died when he couldn't remember his blood type

He kept saying "be positive", but it's hard without him.

My father's friend died in an car accident.

My father took me to his friend's funeral even though I didn't knew anyone of the people who attended that funeral. Few moments later a gentleman stood beside me and said,

Man- Hey kid, enjoy your life to your fullest and never give up in your life. These are the days which you'll remember y...

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My friend died after falling into a huge vat of beer.

It took 5 hours to kill the poor bastard and he had to get out 3 times to take a piss.

My construction worker friend died

As a memorial everyone at his funeral stood around making themselves look busy

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My friend died at an orgy the other day and nobody knows why.

It's a fucking mystery.

My friend died during his trip in Germany

Apparently he had an undiagnosed Guten allergy.

"My fat friend died on a set of moving stairs," said my wife.

That escalated slowly

My friend died yesterday, we couldn’t find his blood type in time for the transfusion.

Even to the bitter end, he said “Be positive.”

My friend died because he was allergic to plantains...

He went into bananaphalactic shock.

My best friend died yesterday, so I went to see his wife

I said to her “look on the bright side, at least he’s not suffering anymore.” She said “but he wasn’t sick, he died suddenly.” I said “I know, I meant being married to you”

What did Jay Z say when his friend died?

No Biggie.

My friend died from an explosion after lighting his fart on fire.

But I know he's at peace because the last thing he saw was a light at the end of his tunnel.

I’m still shocked that my friend died when his cocaine suddenly exploded.

It was a devastating blow.

My friend died today...

He wasn't able to speak, but in his dying moments he wanted me to have his EpiPen. I'll cherish it forever.

My friend died from diarrhea

It saddened me to watch him go

After my friend died from an allergic reaction to peanuts,

I went to his funeral. Everyone got upset when I put an Epipen on his tombstone.

So I explained:

"It's what he would have wanted"

My sausage-addicted friend died in a car crash.

Apparently, he took a turn for the wurst.

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My friend died doing what he loved...

Shouting "fuck bears" in the woods.

My friend died when she saw a wild ox wearing a knitted jumper.

It was a Cardi Yak arrest.

What would be a tragedy?

One day, Donald Trump visited an elementary school, to tell the children about his success, and to show off his ‘intelligence’.
The schoolchildren were learning vocabulary, specifically the word ‘tragedy’, when the famous businessman stormed into the classroom.
Trump decided to help the childr...

A man comes in a bar everyday for a couple of weeks, orders 2 shots of whiskey and leaves...

One day the barkeeper asked him why he never wants to drink something else? The man replied: „My best friend moved to australia a couple of weeks ago and we both decided to go to a bar everyday and drink 2 shots of whiskey so it‘s like we’re drinking them together.“ The barkeeper was amazed and said...

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