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Four Seasons Jokes

The four seasons were arguing about which of them was the best…

Winter boasts, "Well, you can build snowmen and the snow is so beautiful. And Christmas!! Everyone loves Christmas!"

Spring laughs, "Well sure, but come springtime, everything is so fresh and new! All the new flowers, it can't get much better than that!"

Summer rays, "Yes, but I am und...

After Rudy Giuliani held a press conference at Four Seasons Total Landscaping, he experienced chest pains.

He was quickly rushed to Mount Sinai Heating & Plumbing.

Four Seasons Total Landscaping

I’m not ready to stop laughing.

Four men and their wives are having babies…

Four men are in the hospital waiting room because their wives are having babies

A nurse goes up to the first guy and says, “Congratulations! You're the father of twins.”

“That's odd,” answers the man

“I work for the Minnesota Twins!”

A nurse says to the second guy, “Congr...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The infamous crime mafia, known only as The Four Seasons, awaited their next job.

The boss stood before them.

"Winter," he began. "I need you to stay *cool* in the face of pressure. *Ice* in your veins," he said, patting his shoulder.

"Now, Summer," he continued. "If the *heat* becomes too much for Winter, use that *fiery* temper of yours to make sure the cops reme...

I took my date for a romantic time at the Four Seasons..

She was ecstatic and bought several rare seedlings and pots of plants.. 5/5 would recommend!

What are the four seasons called in New England?

Almost winter, Winter, Still winter, and 3 months of bad sledding.

People: You can't have all four seasons in the space of 24 hours!

Ohio: Hold my beer.

*inspired by the fact that yesterday it was 74F and had thunderstorms, and today it's 30F and snowing.*

Trump is going to make soon a major announcement

Meet us again at Four Seasons Total Landscaping parking lot

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Four men are waiting for their wives in a marital ward.

edit: maternity ward, sorry my vocab is crap

They're all very anxious about becoming a father. After waiting some time, the doctor appears and congratulates the first man.

"Congratulations, your wife had twins!"

The man was relieved, but was a bit surprised. "What a coincidence...

Wind Turbines

We all know wind turbines are good for the environment, but what if we designed a bine that could be used all four seasons?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the weather got in common with me masturbating in a hotel?

We both come in Four Seasons

Four expectant fathers pace back and forth in a hospital waiting room while their wives are in labor.

The nurse enters and tells the first man, “Congratulations, you’re the father of twins!”



“What a coincidence,” the man says. “I work for the Minnesota Twins baseball team.”



A little later, the nurse returns and tells the second man, “You are the father of triplets!”
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

She checked out of this hotel really quick...

Last week, a young woman checked into the Four Seasons in Palm Beach and was a bit lonely. She thought, "Ill call one of those men you see advertised in phone books for escorts and sensual massages."
 

She looked through the phone book and found a full page ad for a guy calling hi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

This may be why Teachers retire early or turn to drinking: the following questions were in a (UK) GED (grade 12 equivalent) examination (they are genuine answers):

Q. What is a turbine?
A. Something an Arab or Sheik wears on his head. Once an Arab boy reaches puberty, he removes his diaper and wraps it around his head.

Q. How is dew formed?
A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q. In a democratic society, how impor...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

THINGS I LEARNED LIVIN' IN LOUISIANA Enjoy!

1) A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.

2) There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in Louisiana .

3) There are 10,000 types of spiders, and all 10,000 of them live in Louisiana .

4) If it grows, it'll stick ya. If it crawls, it'll bite ...

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