UPJOKE

Favourite Food Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What was Hitler's favourite food?

Nazi goreng

what is Doctor Who's favourite food?

Dalek bread.

What's a sea monster's favourite food?

Fish and ships

What is a car's favourite food?

Traffic jam!

What’s an epileptics favourite food?

Seizure Salad.

What's an Anti-vaxxers favourite food?

An Apple.

Because it's keeps the doctors away

What’s a pirate’s favourite food?

Pizza, it always comes in pieces o’ eight.

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What’s poop’s favourite food?

Peanut butter and smelly.

Courtesy of my 6 year old.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"What do cows like to do in their spare time?"

Go to the moovies.

So, what is their favourite genre?

Moosicals.

Also, who is their favourite Italian dictator?

Moosolini.

And what's their favourite food?

(After they inevitably say some "moo" pun, reply in your dryest, most serious voice)

... No, co...

What is a train’s favourite food? Gum.

*chew* *chew*

What is a terrorists favourite food?

Anything Allah-cart.


I found it funny. I was exploding with laughter.

What's a Dragon Ball fan's favourite food?

Vegeta-bles

A terrible pun

What is a mathematicians favourite food?

Pie

Girl and Guy on first date.

They were just asking each other different random questions to get acquainted.. one of the questions was about food and what their favourite food was...

Girl: Oh my god I love cheese.

Guy: Lucky for you, I'm not circumcised.

Mother of my girlfriend invited me to dinner at their house

On the question: "What is your favourite food?", "your daughter" is wrong answer.

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[Long] A scientist is giving keynote speech about dissolvable food for babies

"Imagine if we lived in a world where you no longer had to worry about your children eating and getting food stuck in their airways...'

Gasps of amazement come from the crowd

"Imagine if they could still enjoy all of their favourite foods without any danger and don't need to be constan...

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One day a scientist had a brilliant idea

He thought to himself, "People are so preoccupied with talking animals, why don't i make the first ever talking food!". This was a momentous idea that he just had, and he thought it best to experiment on his favourite food item: Matzo balls.

The scientist made a matzo ball, and after much tri...

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A man was no longer interested in having sex...

So his wife decided to buy him some of the new UltraSexTablets to get him going again. She went to the doctor, who told her to grind up half a tablet into his favourite food so he won’t notice it.
The next morning, the wife was cooking breakfast and felt like putting the new wonder drug to the...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why Men Are Happier

NICKNAMES

If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.
If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.

EATING OUT

When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will e...

I fell in love with an amazing man

When he proposed I decided to make a huge sacrifice: I gave up on my favourite food, beans.

A few months later, on my birthday, my car broke down. Called him to let him know I was coming later. Suddenly I smelled baked beans from a nearby restaurant and couldn't help myself. I figured I'd hav...

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