UPJOKE

Favorite Position Jokes

My favorite position

Is the JFK.

I explode all over her lap while she screams and tries to get out of the car.

Wife’s favorite position

I’ve discovered that my wife’s favorite position in bed is doggy style....
I sit up and beg while she rolls over and plays dead...

Two guys are in a bar, having a beer and discussing different positions. The first one announces, “My favorite position is ‘the rodeo.’”

“How does that one work?” asks his friend.

“Well,” the first one replies, “you get your wife on all four on the bed, then do it to her doggy style. When she really starts enjoying it, you whisper in her ear, 'Your sister likes this position, too.' Then you try and hang on for eight seconds!”

My favorite position is the 68.

You go down on me and I'll owe you one!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why is cowgirl my girlfriend's favorite position?

Because she says I'm only good at fucking up.

My favorite position has always been doggystyle.

Now I just have to train the dog to stop barking.

I signed up for a soccer team and they asked me my favorite position.

I told them missionary style but lately I've had a hard time scoring.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My wife said if I didn’t stop talking about work she’d leave me. She got sexy and asked my favorite position to help.

I guess “ceo” was the wrong answer. She’s leaving me.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My favorite sex position.

So me and my girl were talking about previous lovers and what our favorite sex position was in our last relationship as well as our ex's favorite. So she went first and said that her ex-boyfriend's favorite position was doggy-style because he could grab her by her hips and really get in deep. She sa...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man goes to a psychiatrist

A man goes to a psychiatrist for a variety of psychological issues.

During the interview the subject of sex comes up.

The doctor asked him how often do you have intercourse with your wife?
Three times a week he replied.

And what's your favorite position that you both enjoy?...

My wife loves sports...

Her favorite position is beside herself, and her favorite sport is jumping to conclusions.

A man goes to the doctor, and find he only has 12 hours left to live....

He heads home and tells his wife the bad news. She breaks down crying, but then pulls herself together and promises to give him the best night he could possibly hope for.

They go out for dinner at his favorite restaurant, ordering all of his favorite dishes. They then head out for drinks and ...

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