UPJOKE

E Reader Jokes

A woman was out golfing and hit the ball deep into the woods.

When she went to look for it she found a frog in a trap.

The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes."

The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes.

Whatever ...

Why does Kim Jong Un have such a big library?

Because he's Supreme Reader

Why do cannibals hang out in libraries?

Because Readers Digest

How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None. It's left to the reader as an exercise.

Russian literature is built on suffering.

Either the character suffers, the author suffers, or the reader suffers. If all three are suffering, then it's considered a Russian masterpiece.

They say Kim Jong Un has read every single book

That must be why everyone calls him the supreme reader

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A male gorilla at the zoo had been separated from his mate for several months and was really horney.

One night after the zoo had closed and all the animal keepers had left, he decided he was going to tear the bars apart and screw the first thing he could find. As he left his cage and ran through the zoo he came upon a lion sleeping in the grass. He really wasn't thrilled with his find but since he ...

So I got my concealed carry permit yesterday

So I got my concealed carry gun permit yesterday and then went over to the local Bass Pro Shop to get a small caliber pistol for home protection. When I was ready to pay for the gun, the cashier said, “Strip down, facing me.” Making a mental note to complain about these new invasive gun control laws...

Two mathematicians walk into a bar...

The punchline is trivial and is left as an exercise to the reader

I just saw a cashier scan the eyes

of a rude customer with her barcode reader.
The look on his face was priceless.

I just read an article in the news that Kim Jong Un reads more than 1,000 books a year...

I guess that’s why they call him the Supreme Reader.

Once a woman was playing golf in a dark forest.

She hit the golf ball so hard that it got lost in the forest. She went in search of that ball.

She found the ball near a bush. As she kneeled to pick it up, She heard a voice

“I am stuck in the the bush. Help me and I will grant you three wishes.”

She saw that there was a frog i...

Donald Trump's first summit with Kim Jong-un was only to get feedback about the quality of his tweets.

Who better to ask than the Supreme Reader?

Kim Jong Un was given an international literary award a couple days ago...

... but nobody should be surprised; he is the Supreme Reader.

Gentlemen...BEHOLD! Puns.

What do you call a cool mushroom?...A fun guy!!!

A neutron walks into a bar. "I'd like a beer" he says. The bartender promptly serves up a beer. "How much will that be?" asks the neutron. "For you?" replies the bartender, "no charge"

A guy walks into a restaurant, and takes a seat. Acr...

A Moldy Oldie

Complaining of his marriage for thirty-odd years

He highballed his eyeballs, comforting his tears

The barkeep asked, what's troubling you son?

He poured out his life; I'm finished! I'm done!

The woman I married has turned into a nag

What I wouldn't give to be rid o...

What was Kim Jong Un's favorite class in school?

Literature. He is a supreme reader after all.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

True story at a funeral. This is a story rather than a joke, but there's a funny part.

This probably belongs in r/funny but I'm posting it here because in my reddit experience, those folks have a very narrow sense of humor (Leno/Foxworthy type stuff) - and I wanted to give a bit of a laugh to people.

I also apologize to more sensitive readers because this is a story relating to...

How did Kim Jong Un learn every word in the English dictionary in one day?

He's the Supreme reader.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.