UPJOKE

Blonde Guy Jokes

A Blonde guy burned two ears...

So they were asking him at the hospital how it happened.

He said, ''I was ironing my clothing and the phone rang... So, instead of the phone I picked up the iron and burned my ear...''

''But how the heck did you burn the other ear?'' The doctor asked.

''They called back.''

Blonde guy gets home from work...

Hears his wife screaming, coming from their bedroom upstairs. He sprints up, and opens the door to see his wife laying naked on their bed, sweating and panting.

"Honey! Help! I'm having a heart attack!"

He runs back down the stairs and starts dialing the ambulance, when his son and dau...

The first blonde GUY joke

An Irishman, a Mexican and a blonde guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building.

They were eating lunch and the Irishman said: "Corned beef and cabbage.
If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I'm going to jump off this building."
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A blonde guy walks into a bar

A hefty, muscular gun toting blond guy from Austin Texas goes to a bar on his Harley Davidson. He parks the bike outside, goes in and orders a drink.

Now the regulars at this bar have a habit of picking on newcomers. So when the blond goes back his bike is missing from its spot. He walks back...

A blonde man is driving down the road when he sees another blonde guy sitting in a rowboat in the middle of a field. He pulls over and yells "its guys like you that give us blondes a bad rap!

And you're lucky I can't swim or I'd come out there and kick your ass!"

This blonde guy needs money...

One night, this blonde guy gets down on his knees by his bed and says "Oh Lord, we really need some money. Please let me win the lottery." And he goes to bed.

The next morning, the blonde guy wakes up and checks the news. He didn't win. So that night, he gets down on his knees again and says,...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why do blondes have bruises on their bellybutton?

Blonde guys aren't that smart either!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did the blonde womand have bruises around her belly button?

Because there are blonde guys as well.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I am a Chinese....

Black, Jewish blonde guy. I've just parked my bus and crossed the road and walked into a bar and told to bartender: "you know what? My life is a fucking joke"

Blonde father

A blonde guy and a brunette girl were happily married and about to have a baby.

One day, the wife started having contractions, so the husband rushed her to the hospital. He held her hand as she went through a trying birth. In the end, there were two little baby boys.

The blonde guy tur...

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