UPJOKE

Bad Boy Jokes

Bad boy and good girl (long)

So a guy decides he wants to date this girl. He finds out that she's quite prudish but he's willing to look past that because she's really, really pretty. After constantly asking her, she finally agrees to go out with him. One date leads to another and soon they have a steady thing going. He wants ...

Girls like bad boys, so why can't I get a girlfriend?

I'm bad at literally everything. (If you came here expecting a joke, I'm sorry, the joke is my life)

I always looks for a chick who is into bad boys.

Because I'm pretty much bad at everything.

Hey girl, I heard you like bad boys

Well not to brag or anything but
I'm bad at everything

Mom, what is a girlfriend?

Mom, what is a girlfriend?

When you grow up, you will know.

Can I have one?

Yes, when you grow up and be a good boy, you'll have a girlfriend.

What if I become a bad boy?

You' ll have many.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The good husband

Sheryl Sandberg: My advice to women is date all of them: the bad boys, the cool boys, the commitment-phobic boys, the crazy boys. But do not marry them. The things that make the bad boys sexy do not make them good husbands. When it comes time to settle down, find someone who wants an equal partner. ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I caught my wife having sex with my best friend.

So I rolled up a newspaper and told him he was a bad boy.

A good boy asked to his mummy.....

Little Charles approached his mother and asked her "Mummy, whats a girlfriend" To which his mum replied "If you're a good boy, you will get one." Charles then asked, "What if I am a bad boy?" His mum answered "You will get many.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

CONFESSIONS OVER TIME

100 Years Ago: "Forgive me, father, for I have sinned."

Today: "Sorry Daddy, I've been a bad boy.



Whichever the year, you still get dicked.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Little Johnny raises his hand in class...

"Hey Teach, can I go to the bathroom, I gotta take a piss right bad!"
The teacher at the end of her rope dealing with his antics all day screamed at him, "URINATE JOHNNY !! URINATE !!"
Johnny without missing a beat replied, "Thanks teach, I always thought of myself as a solid 7 but apparent...

Imagine Hollywood is making a feature film about creating the perfect meal

In the first act of the movie, they go through many trials and tribulations to decide on what bread they should use. Eventually they decide on tortilla

The second act, they’re now plotting on what should go IN the bread. Meat, veggies, maybe neither.

Finally, the third act. now they j...

Little Johnny wanted a red bicycle for Christmas.

He asked his mother, “Can I have a red bicycle for Christmas?”

“No, you’ve been a bad boy all year. Why do you think Santa should get you a red bicycle for Christmas? I want you to go and write a letter to God explaining why you should get a red bicycle for Christmas.”

So Little Johnny...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[Religion] If you're religious this is not for you. The setup is completely fictional. Please don't get offended.

The catholic church would have you believe that Jesus Christ was one single person while, actually they were a set of twins - Jesus and Christ. It was through this that Jesus came back to life, Christ was crucified and Jesus made a religion by apparently coming back to life.
Christ was a...

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