UPJOKE

If April Showers bring May Flowers, then what do May Flowers bring?

Smallpox.

Why do Native Americans hate April?

Because April showers bring May Flowers, and Mayflowers bring white people.

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?

Pilgrims.

I’ll be here all week folks, try the veal.

If April showers bring May flowers...

I'm on track to get 2 flowers next month.

If April showers bring May flowers, what does April snow bring?

Incredulous Facebook posts about the arrival of spring.

April showers bring May flowers. What do May flowers bring?

June bugs.

What do June bugs bring? Small grub-eating mammals, wasps, and endoparasitoid pyrgotidae flies.

A mathematician walks into a bar on a rainy April day...

The bartender asks him, "Hey, do you know what April showers bring?"

The mathematician says, "Pilgrims!"

Bring May Flowers

*It's a rainy April afternoon, and Victor is visiting his friend Angela.*

*She has two kids, April (age 14) and Thomas (age 19)*

_____________________

*Angela answers the knock at her door*

Victor: Hey Angela! Thanks for inviting me over.

Angela: Glad to have you ...

April and June were dating...

The couple had been together many years, and, as far as one could tell from the outside were very happy together. But June had always felt as though there was something between them, something holding them back- something that April was keeping a secret.

As time went by, June got the impressi...

A twist on a Thanksgiving classic . . .

Written by my twelve-year-old brother:

Q: April showers bring May flowers. What do May flowers bring?
A: Separatists and small pox.

In April of 1620, it rained. That same year, the Pilgrims arrived.

I suppose the saying is true. April showers bring Mayflowers.

Seasonal Jokes

Spring
Q: If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?
A: Pilgrims!
Summer
Q: What do you call a dog on the beach in the Summer?
A: A hot dog!
Q: Why do bananas use sunscreen?
A: Because they peel.
Fall
Q. How you mend a broken pumpkin?
A. With a pumpk...

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