"I would like to thank my arms, for always being by my side. My legs, for always supporting me, as best they could. As for my fingers, well I could always count on them. And finally my hips, for they never lied."
My college acceptance speech:
I'd like to thank Bigfoot for believing in me even though I never believed in him.
What's 18 inches long and never gets used?
Leonardo DiCaprio's acceptance speech.
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