9999 Jokes

Seriously, every one of them I ask says 999-9999

If he thinks that's bad, I'm missing 9999 pieces.

I'm a ladies man. I saw this fine German woman. I didn't even have to chat her up for her to hastily give me her number. It was easy to remember 999 9999.

In Colorado they took down the mile marker sign for 420
They were afraid that the potheads were going to try and steal it.
They replaced it with a mile marker 419.9999 repeating sign
Well this caused the sign to get stolen by the MATH nerds,
who also swiftly stole the cosine and... read more

Apparently, it was 999-999-9999.

The father asks each of his three sons the same question, "what does two plus two equal?"

The accountant son answers, "four point zero zero."

The engineer son answers "somewhere between 3.9999 and 4.0001."

Finally, the father asks his son the lawyer "what does two plus two equal... read more

and you’ll never believe it her number is 999-999-9999.

and orders 1 beers

and orders 5 beers

and orders 9999 beers

and orders -1 beers

and orders foobar beers

Why? Simple math.

Everyone knows the Hotness scale of 0-10. However, not many know the amount of people at each level.

Assuming 7.4 Billion people there are:

~5 billion 5's

~1 billion 6's

~100 million 7's

~9 million 8's

~220 thousand 9's

~2 tho... read more