UPJOKE
housechamberupstairslocker roomroomroomfulscullerycloakroomroomyboardroomhouseroomanteroombackroomlibraryclubroom

Your Room Jokes

“Son, I found a condom in your room.”

“Gee thanks, Grandpa!”

“Why are you calling me Grandpa?”

“Because I couldn’t find it yesterday.”

A photon walks into a hotel and orders a room. The bellhop asks, “Can I carry your baggage to your room for you?”

The photon says, "No, I'm traveling light."

Dad: “GO TO YOUR ROOM NOW!”

Child: *Storms off* “JIM MORRISON WAS OVERRATED!”

Dad: “WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT SLAMMING THE DOORS!?”

Do you suffer from anxiety that an intruder may be hiding in your room?

You're not alone.

What do you do if your room is cold?

Just go stand in a corner, they are usually 90 Degrees

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

One night a guy goes to get a room in a hotel. "Hello, I want a single room for the night please." "Fine, sir, here's one of our best rooms. Room 13," says the concierge and hands him the key

The guy goes upstairs, takes a shower and gets straight into bed. At about 2 0'clock in the morning, two gorgeous naked women come in and slide under the covers. When he realizes what is going on, he starts screwing both of them. He can't believe what's happening. Next morning, still surprised by la...

What do your room and the Bermuda Triangle have in common?

Things mysteriously disappear there.

I caught a really bad case of the flu in Madrid.

Whilst sniffling and coughing and rolling around in the hotel bed, I realised I needed medical attention, so I called the concierge to get help.

"Oh, so you're sick!" came the reply. "Not a problem, we'll send our very own hotel doctor up to your room right away!"

The doctor strolled i...

The worst feeling ever is when you're studying in your room peacefully in full focus mode and a member of your family enter the room and..

wakes you up

I calmly opened the door and said, “Son, I found a condom in your room.” He looked up sheepishly and groaned, “Thanks Grandpa.”

“Why did you call me Grandpa?” I questioned.

He laughed nervously, “Because I couldn’t find it yesterday.”

A politician dies

So a politician dies and ends up standing in front of the pearly gates. Saint Peter looks at him for a second, flicks through his book, and finds his name.


"So, you're a politician..." "Well, yes, is that a problem?" "Oh no, no problem. But we've recently adopted a new system for people...

4 comrades go to a Soviet hotel for a night during a business trip...

As they walk into their room, 3 of them, whip out some vodka, food and cigarettes and begin to make jokes about the government and be very loud indeed. The 4th one is trying to get some meaningful sleep and knowing that it would be fruitless to ask them to stop, hatches an ingenious plan.
He goes...

Patrick wants a bike...

For his birthday, little Patrick asked for a 10-speed bicycle. His father said, "Son, we'd give you one, but the mortgage on this house is $80,000 & your mother just lost her job. There's no way we can afford it."

The next day the father saw little Patrick heading out the front door with ...

"Sir, we were unable to find your room. What did you say your name was again?"

"Highlander. There should be only one."

Hate it when you’re looking through your room and can’t find a coat hanger

You have to go all the way to the doctors to get an abortion

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How do you know if your room mate is gay?

his dick tastes like shit

Legend says that if you stand in front of the mirror in your room at 3 and say "Bloody Mary" loudly

Then your mom will appear, throw sandals at you and tell you to shut the hell up and go to sleep.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.