UPJOKE

You Stink Jokes

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A 70 year old couple had been dating for a couple of months... Long NSFW

After a night of dinner and a movie they went back to the lady’s house and things started escalating from there. As they were making out and getting friskier by the moment the lady said to the man that it’d been a very long time since a man has pleasured her orally. Wanting to please her the man mad...

Smell

It was a particularly tough football game, and nerves were on edge. The home team had been the victim of three or four close calls, and they were now trailing the visitors by a touch-down and a field goal. When the official called yet another close one in the visitors' favor, the home quarterback bl...

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A homeless man is walking across a bridge...

A homeless man (a particularly homeless-looking homeless man) is walking across a bridge and comes across the most beautiful woman he's ever seen standing at the edge, ready to jump off. He goes over to her and says

"Miss, you can't do this! You're so beautiful and there has to be so many g...

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Man buys a parrot after his wife leaves him

A man's wife leaves him and he is lonely so he decides to go to a pet shop to alleviate his depravity.

He walks into the pet shop and one of the first things he notices is a parrot perched in a cage.

The parrot immediately starts talking "You're wonderful I love you your the greatest I...

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A man who's had a few too many

A man is out drinking most of the day and next thing he knows the night has really gotten away from him. He's so loaded he ends up puking on his shirt. He is telling the bartender that he doesn't know how he's going to tell his wife that he let himself get that drunk. The bartender tells him t...

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Boudreaux and Thibodeaux are sitting in a bar...

They're both drinking heavily and having a great time when Boudreaux throws up all over himself.

"Oh man, my wife is gonna kill me when I get home and she sees this" cried Boudreaux.

Thibodeaux says "Don't worry" and he hands Boudreaux a twenty dollar bill. "When you get home, just te...

On a warm summer morning, a family of ducks and a family of skunks are crossing a country road when...

without warning, a car barrels over a hill and into the path of the animals wiping out both families except for one baby duckling and one baby skunkling. The pair hightail it off the road and find refuge in a hole in a tree. They decide to stick together and support each other in order to survive. T...

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