UPJOKE

What Is The Opposite Of Jokes

What is the opposite of a Debbie Downer?

Bethamphetamine

What is the opposite of a croissant?

A happy uncle.

What is the opposite of progress?

Congress

What is the opposite of lovey?

Haiti

What is the opposite of lady fingers?

Mentos.

What is the opposite of Christopher Reeves?

Christopher Walken.

What is the opposite of mansplaining?

Missunderstanding.

What is the opposite of sensei?

Nonsensei

What is the opposite of a wandering Jew?

A Roamin’ Catholic

What is the opposite of irony?

Wrinkly.

what is the opposite of downvoted into oblivion?

Upvoted into skyrim.

What is the opposite of a protein?

An amateur teen ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

My 5 yr old son came up with this - what is the opposite of Kathmandu?

DogLadyDont

What is the opposite of mango?

Womanstay. (One of *the* worst and yet best jokes my dad made. I love him.)

What is the opposite of a Mermaid...

... a landlord!!

(this is my sister’s joke, I can’t take credit for it)

What is the opposite of mangoes?

Woman comes

What is the opposite of Microsoft Office?

Macrohard onfire.

What is the opposite of Underwear?

Derwear

What is the opposite of a woman wearing a burka

A naked man wearing a blindfold

What is the opposite of a lesson?

A more-on!

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress?

congress



(my dad told this one to me today and I had never heard of it so I apologize if everyone has already seen this joke before)

What is the opposite of Nautica clothing?

Ica clothing

Teacher: What is the opposite of antibiotic

Student: Uncle-biotic

What is the opposite of Le Stop?

Lego

What is the opposite of Down Syndrome?

Down Gooddeeddrome

What is the opposite of defeat?

Da hands

What is the opposite of ‘isolate’?

yousoearly

"Soldier, tell me what is the opposite of cancer."

"Can't, sir!"

What is the opposite of a chick flick?

A Rush concert.

What is the opposite of Domino's?

Domi doesn't know

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"What is the opposite of Laughing?", The teacher asks the student.

Student replies, "Fucking."

The stunned teacher asks the student to explain his answer.

The student says " Laughing is ha ha ha; Whereas, Fucking is ah ah ah"!!!

What is the opposite of fire fly?

Water fall

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What is the opposite of shit posting?

Piss lurking.

What is the opposite of "Typhoid Mary"

Marie Cure-y

What is the opposite of Tony?

Finger elbow.

What is the opposite of mainsplaining?

Ma'amsplaining

What is the opposite of the suspension of disbelief?

The Flat Earth Society.

What is the opposite of paranoia?

Thinking you are following someone.

What is the opposite of a duck?

A jump!

*sorry*

What is the opposite of leapfrog?

Toadstool

*i'll just see myself out*

What is the opposite of the choke hold in wrestling?

The Heimlich maneuver

What is the opposite of a meme?

A youyou.

What is the opposite of /r/upliftingnews?

/r/news

What is the opposite of an iPad Mini?

A Maxi Pad

Opposites

A theology professor at a rural community college started the class by asking the students, "What is the opposite of joy?" "Sadness," said one student. "And the opposite of depression?" "Elation," said another. "And how about the opposite of woe?"

A redneck in the back of the class stood up f...

Southern University Psychology Joke

At a southern university, students in the psychology program were attending their first class on emotional extremes. “Just to establish some parameters,” said the professor to the student from Arkansas, “what is the opposite of joy?” “Sadness,” said the student. “And the opposite of depression?” he ...

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