UPJOKE

Use Condoms Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Pregnant Girlfriend Guy: But doctor that can't be right. We use condoms every time we have sex. Doctor: Well, the test result would suggest otherwise. Maybe the condom broke? Guy: No I'm sure it didn't.

Doctor: Alright then. Let me tell you a story. A guy was wandering in the forest where he encountered a tiger. The tiger looked really ferocious and the guy knew that he was doomed. Cornered, the guy then points his umbrella's tip at the tiger and shouts Bang at the tiger. The tiger died.

Guy...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"Hey Bud, why don't you use condoms?"

"My pull out game is superb. Condoms are also expensive, gotta pinch pennies when you have 14 kids to feed."

I asked my Russian friend why he didn’t use condoms

“I’m Catholic” he explained, “And I Don’t See How I Vould impregnate my boyfriend anyway.”

What do guys who don’t use condoms and the British government have in common

Both will promise to come out smooth and clean on paper and then cause a huge mess in practise

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why don't gypsies use condoms ?

They have crystal balls so they see it coming.

Men who don't use condoms are more responsible than ones that do.

They have a baby to take care of.

Research shows that 80% of men don’t know how to use condoms

These men are called dads

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