* I said to the gym teacher: 'Can you teach me to do the splits?' * He said: 'How flexible are you?' * I said: 'I can't make Tuesdays.'"
Doctor Doctor
Ok so a Tommy Cooper joke that has kept me chuckling all day.
So I went to the Doctor’s yesterday. He said, “What appears to be the problem?” I said, “I keep having this dream, night after night, beautiful girls rushing towards me and I keep pushing them away.” I see says the doctor I am not...
I took saxophone lessons for six months...
...until I dislocated my jaw. How did I know I was supposed to blow in the small end?
(credit: Tommy Cooper)
"Doctor, I can't pronounce my Fs, my Ts or my Hs."
"Well you can't say fairer than that then."
(it's an old Tommy Cooper joke, no credit to me)
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