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Through The Keyhole Jokes

A little girl says to her mother: "Mummy, when you were away at work a strange lady came around"...

"Not now," says Mummy. "Wait until Daddy gets home."

So they wait until Daddy gets home, and then Mummy says "Now dear, what were you saying about Daddy and the strange lady?"

And Daddy starts to say something but Mummy says, "You keep quiet - I'll be talking to my attorney in the mo...

A little boy was looking through the keyhole of his sister's room

Mom says with a smile, "why are you concerned with what your sister is doing in there?"
Boy replies, "I am not concerned with her, I am wondering what dad is doing."

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I dont own this joke. But i havent forgotten about it for five years.

Son: "Dad, I have to do a special report for school. Can I ask you a question?"

Father: "Sure son. What's the question?"

Son: "What is Politics?"

Father: "Well, let's take our home for an example. I am the wage earner, so let's call me "Capitalism". your mother is the administra...

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A man was traveling through Asia when one night, he stopped at a monastery

He asked the monks for a place to sleep and some food, and the monks indulged him. But that night, he couldn't sleep. He kept hearing this droning, thumping sound. After a while, he went to investigate. He followed the sound down the stairs, into the basement. There he encountered a richly decorated...

Little Johnny's Testimony

Little Johnny was home with mom while dad was away at work.
Mom asked "So, Johnny boy. What did you do with daddy while I was at grandma's yesterday?"
"I was doing my homework that suddenly aunt Lilly came home and daddy took her to your bedroom and locked the door. When I looked through the ...

Go to the movies

Little Billy comes home from school one day and sees a note on the bedroom door.

"We left $15 on the table, go to the movies"

Curious, Billy looks through the keyhole and sees his dad on top of his mom, saying "Boy, Boy, Boy, Boy".

9 months later Billy's mom gives birth to a lit...

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Little Igor was struggling with his home assignment

Little Igor was struggling with his home assignment so he went to his dad Mr. Igor for help.

Dad: what is this assignment about?

Little Igor: teacher asks us to write a sentence with the words country, party, people and citizen. And I don't know what these words mean.

Dad: you s...

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What are Politics?

A young boy asks his father what politics are at the dinner table. His father responds with, "Well look at it this way son, I'm the president since I run the household. Your mother is the government since she pays the bills, the nanny is the working class since she works for me, and you and your lit...

Little boy...

A single mom and her young son live in a trailer on the outskirts of town.
One night, the little boy gets up to use the bathroom and hears strange sounds coming from his mom's bedroom.
He quietly peeks through the keyhole and sees his mother lying spread-eagle and naked on the bed, touching ...

A 9 year old kid walks down the hallway of his house

and hears something coming from his older sisters room. He peeks through the keyhole and sees his sister naked caressing herself and saying, "Oh, I want a boy, Oh I need a boy."

The boy didn't understand so he kept walking to his room. The next day he looked through the keyhole again and saw...

Little Johnny walks past his parents bedroom one day

He hears funny noises, and decides to check it out through the keyhole. He sees his naked dad on top of his mum, and with a mind full of questions he goes to bed.

The next morning he told his parents what he saw. A little surprised , the parents quickly made up a response: we were making you ...

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4 nuns line up for confession

The first nun says: "forgive me father, for I have sinned. Last night, a homeless man sought shelter in our walls, so we gave him a room and some new clothes. While he was changing, I peaked through the keyhole and I stared longingly at his penis."

The priest says: "do not be ashamed, my chi...

So Little Timmy is Playing with His Legos...

...when all of a sudden his mother comes up to him. She tells him "Timmy, when your father comes home can you tell him to come to our room? Tell him it's very very important". Timmy agrees and continues to play with his legos. A couple of hours later the father comes home and Timmy runs to him and s...

A hen walks into a library

Walks up to the librarian and says “book”, the librarian looks a little confused but gets a book and gives to the hen, who tucks it under her wing and then walks out.

The hen comes back in the next day, walks up to the librarian and goes “book book book” the librarian is amazed and hands over...

Ole and Sven and two Swedish girls

Ole and Sven are the best of friends, and they have two Swedish girls on the string - Lena and Olga - who live together in an apartment.

One evening Ole and Sven are sitting in the bar getting juiced. Ole turns to Sven and asks, 'Ven do you spose dose girls are gonna make out vit us?'
Sven...

Little Johnny has an assignment from school to describe society and how it works. (Long)

Now, being a little kid he had no idea what to do, so he asked his dad for help. His dad said “ OK, so first think of me as the President, your mum as the Congress, the maid as the workforce and your baby brother as the future. Now see what happens and write that up.”

So Johnny did this and f...

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The teacher told the kid to ask his dad about the government.

Kid goes home and asks his dad -
"What is the government?"

The dad replied -
"Suppose I am the president, your mother is the congress, the maid is the workforce and your younger brother is the future"

and then, he leaves the room. Later at night, the kid heard his younger brot...

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Explaining economics to children...

A young boy asks his father to explain the economy to him. The father thinks for a while before responding, "Son, think of our household as the economy. I earn the money, so I'm capitalism.

"Your mother deals with the day-to-day running of the house, so we'll call her the government.

"...

A hen walks into a library...

...and says, *"Book!"*. The librarian finds this odd, but gives the hen a book of their choice anyway, and the hen leaves.

The next day, the hen comes back and says, *"Bookbookbook!"*. The librarian, still dumbfounded, gives the hen three books and the hen leaves again.

The next day,...

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What is politics?

After arriving home from school, a young boy brings up his homework assignment to his dad. “Daddy, the teacher said to find out how politics works for class.”

The dad replies, “Politics? Well, let me explain, because politics operates in this house.”

“Really?”

“Yes, of course. S...

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How The Government Works

One day, a teacher assigns her kids to do some homework; ask their parents/guardians what the government is, since that's their next lesson. Little Johnny, one of her students, goes home that night and asks his father.

"Well," Dad says, "Think of it this way. I'm the president, Mom is the Con...

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