UPJOKE

I’ve made a website for depressed tennis players…

The servers are currently down...

Never date a tennis player

She’ll drop a deuce when you least expect it.

Why should you never marry a tennis player?

Because to tennis players, love means nothing.

If tennis players get tennis elbow, and squash players get squash knees, what do gynecologists get?

Tunnel Vision

Some Swedish tennis players come into this world born human, some born machine ...

and some bjorn borg.

With the US Open going on...how do tennis players discipline their kids?

Mostly with their forehand, sometimes their backhand.

Why do tennis players love vending machines?

Because they don't have to wait to for their food to be served.

Two tennis players got into a shouting match.

They made quite a racket.

Tennis players grunt too much when they practice...

There's no need for all that racket.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A survey was conducted for poor tennis players who were bad at sex

It was decided on a worst come worst serve basis

I hate the noises tennis players make

Absolute racquet

Hear about the tennis players that didn’t score?

Ya, well, they still made love

How many tennis players does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

What?!? It's out? That's totally in.

I’m surprised there are not a lot of Jewish tennis players.

After all, Moses served in Pharaoh’s court.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I asked my mum why do tennis players always sound like they are having an orgasm...

... and why does she play tennis in the bathroom

This joke is not sponsored by the AUstralian open





**Q:** Can tennis players cook?

**A:** No, they can only serve and return.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Golf balls

Joe was walking towards the first tee, and as he passed the tennis courts one of the tennis players stopped him and asked "what is that in your pocket"

Joe answered "It's golf balls"

"AHH" said the tennis player, "is it like tennis elbow?"

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