UPJOKE

Tattoo You Jokes

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A man was having a pee at a urinal in Jamaica when a local man joined him..

"What is that tattoo you have on your ?" Says the local man

"Oh, it says WY now because it was the name of my ex girlfriend, Wendy, so when I get an erection it says her name.." says the man.

"Take a look at this" the Jamaican shows the man his , also having WY on his .....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man went into a tattoo parlor and asked to have a fifty dollar bill tattooed on his . The tattoo artist said, “I’ve had some strange requests but this one tops the lot. Why in the hell would you want me to tattoo your a picture of a banknote?”

The man replied, “There are three reasons.

One, I love to play with my money.

Two, when I play with my money, I love to see it grow.

Three, and this is the most important of all, the next time my wife wants to blow fifty bucks, she won’t have to leave the house!”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So this girls comes into my tattoo parlor begging to get live laugh love tattooed on her back

Normally I'd say no but she was pretty hot. Next she says she doesn't have any money.

Her: "I can pay you with my watch?"

Me: "I don't want your fake Rolex. Tell you what. I'll tattoo you if you show me your ."

Her: "What? No way! I'm not showing you my . Ask for some...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Worst Injury Imaginable

A South American guy gets into a terrible accident. When he comes to in the hospital, he looks down and sees a rag covering his groin, and notices he can't feel his .

A doctor walks into his hospital room and the guy looks at him, and says, through tears "Give it to me straight, D...

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