Talking To Myself Jokes - 13 Hilarious Talking To Myself Jokes

Me: Is it normal talking to myself?

Me: Yes it is.
Me: Oh, thank God.

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Talking to myself is alright as long as no one replies.

Right?

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Sometimes I like talking to myself...

me too fam

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My psychiatrist told me I need to stop talking to myself

Psh...
What does I know

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I’m tired of people calling me crazy because I’m talking to myself. It’s just not true.

I’m talking to the dead dog and old woman that follow me around.

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I always explain things so the stupidest person in the room can understand

But for some reason I always end up talking to myself.

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A surgeon is about to perform his first surgery...

...and the patient is lying on the surgical table, waiting for the anesthetist. The doctor grabs the patient's hand and takes a deep breath.

Surgeon: "Don't worry, Richard, this is not big deal, just a few cuts here and there, and all done in less than an hour. Tonight you rest, watch the gam...

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A blonde woman goes to the doctor

She says "Doctor, I recently started talking to myself a lot and I'm worried about my mental health"

He calms her down and says "Don't worry, people talk to themselves all the time, I do it too"

So then she responds "Yeah but you're talking to a doctor, I'm just talking with this dumb ...

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Doctor: Calm down David ! It’s just a minor surgery !

Patient: Doctor, I’m not David.

Doctor: I know that, I was talking to myself.

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I always hang out with my imaginary friend.

People used to think I'm crazy talking to myself in public.

But everything is fine now; I wear airpods.

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A doctor performs surgery using local anesthesia

- “Relax, Ernest, it’s just a few cuts with a scalpel. Don’t panic,” the doctor says.

- “But, doctor, my name is not Ernest.”

- “I know... just talking to myself.”

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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A husband goes to an ENT doctor, fed up with his wife's hearing problem.

Husband: Doctor, I am frustrated with my wife's hearing or lack there of. It feels like I am talking to myself all the time. Please help.

Doctor: Where is your wife?

Husband: I called her many times, she didn't respond. I angrily left my home to meet you.

Doctor: Since she is no...

What did the catholic priest say to the child molester?

“Why am I talking to myself?”

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