UPJOKE

I attended a meet called "How Stop Taking Things Literally".

"What brings you here?" asked the host on my first day.

I said, "My legs."

German taking things literally.

They call birth control pills, antibabypillen.

Doctor, doctor... I keep taking things literally.

Doctor: try not to be so serious all the time.

Me: no, you don't understand, I'm a Kleptomaniac

I have a hard time talking to kleptomaniacs.

They’re always taking things literally.

Never tell a pun to a kleptomaniac.

They're always taking things literally.

Two men meet for the first time

The first says “Hi I’m Alex, and something you should know about me is that I have Asperger’s so if I ever seem like I’m being dense forgive me, I have trouble with taking things literally”
“Can you give an example”
“Yes”

I was trying to explain puns to my kleptomaniac friend today...

Unfortunately he kept taking things literally.

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