UPJOKE

Starve To Death Jokes

Why do people never starve to death in the desert?

Because of all the sandwiches there.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did the blind fly starve to death??

Because he couldn't see shit

Why did the cow starve to death?

Because a vegan ate its food.

A man walking in a desert was about to starve to death, when he suddenly...

Died of thirst.

Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day...

Give him a religion and he'll starve to death while praying for a fish.

Why did the blonde starve to death?

Her new phone came with a little packet in the box that said, "Do not eat."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three chefs were stuck on a deserted island.

They were completely out of food and about to starve to death so they decide they need to start eating each other.

First one of them cuts off his own hand. He marinades it in sea salt and then cooks it over a hot fire. The results are exquisite.

"Wonderfully crispy, just like my mother...

Hey, boss, my salary is not compatible with my skills!

I know that, but I can't let you starve to death

Officials have found a brain-eating Amoba in the water supply of Washington DC. Officials are worried

After all, there's a good chance the Amobas will starve to death

What’s the difference between a communist from 40’s USSR and a communist from America now?

One of them didn’t starve to death during the winter.

The crown prince of Saudi Arabia is talking with his counselors.

One of them asks, "What are your current plans?" The prince says, "I'm going to starve to death a few hundred thousand people in Yemen and dismember one journalist." The counselor asks, "Why the journalist?" "See, no one cares about the people in Yemen."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Two Cow Philosophy

A CHRISTIAN DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. You keep one and give one to your neighbor

A SOCIALIST: You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.

A REPUBLICAN: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. So what?

A DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. Your neigh...

A poor man was looking for a job

For weeks he couldn't find one, and he barely had any money left when he found a job at a company as a bathroom cleaner. He went to the office, and after discussing with the boss, he got the job "One thing," said the boss, "I'll need to send you our policy to sign via email". The man looked at him ...

April fools in Latvia

Latvian ask friend if he want potato for lunch. Friend guess is April Fool joke. Say "Too easy, never potato in Latvia, only sadness." One man starve to death during lunch.

The camping story

A couple of years ago I went out camping in the woods with a few of my friends. It was a dark and stormy night, and we felt very alone in our little tent, so we started telling scary stories.

I described how the hills we were in used to be coal mining country, and the coal mines were dark and...

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