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I signed up for Binary 101, but failed it miserably.

I had no idea it was a Level 5 course.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man sees a sign outside a house: 'Talking greyhound For Sale’

He rings the bell, the owner appears and tells him the dog can be viewed in the back garden. The man sees a very nice looking greyhound sitting there.

"Do you really talk?" he asks the greyhound.

"Oh yes," the greyhound replies.

After recovering from the shock of hearing the gre...

Caitlin Jenner just signed a deal with Marvel.

She is going to be in the new Ex-Men film.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Con-fucking-gratulations to me! I'm a screenwriter and I just signed a deal with the parent company of Universal Pictures!

Looks like I'll be going with the basic cable plus HBO Max.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A young man joined the Army and signed up with the paratroopers.

He went through the standard
training, completed the practice jumps from
higher and higher structures, and finally went to
take his first jump from an airplane. The next
day, he called home to his father to tell him the
news.

"So, did you jump?" the father asked.

"We...

A kleptomaniac signed up for a cooking class,

He wanted to take a whisk.

I'm really pleased that our band has just signed a Jamaican triangle player.

Now every little *ting* is gonna be all right!

Signed up for my company’s 401(k) today…

Unfortunately I’m not sure if I’ll be able to run that far.

I signed up for the company 401k.

But, I'm concerned that I can't run that far.

I recently signed an apartment lease...

Below where I signed on the lease agreement I had my dad cosign

Now we're tan.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Putin and Biden are wrapping up their discussion...

Putin says: "You know, Joe. I had this dream few days ago"

Biden: "Oh, what kind of dream?"

Putin: "I saw America, in flames. Nuclear warhead crater where Capitol used to be. New York leveled. Los Angeles covered in human ash. It was Glorious, Joe. I nearly teared up..."

Biden: ...

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