What does a dog and a near-sighted gynecologist have in common?

A wet nose

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

People who say ‘I can hit my kids because they’re MINE’ are literally the worst, most disgusting, short sighted, hell bound...

selfish people on the planet.


We should all be able to smack your jerk kids.

What did the evil optometrist say to the near sighted convention?

”You will see! You will ALL see!!!”

Did you hear about the short sighted circumciser?

He got the sack.

Why did the partially-sighted kid go to the public swimming pool?

He wanted adult supervision.

Why did the partially sighted woman fall down a well?

Because she couldn't see that well

Two blind guys chat

– You know, my girlfriend left me for a sighted guy!

– Well, you should've see it coming.

A pirate’s pants

There was a pirate captain who would ask his lieutenant to bring his red trousers whenever an enemy vessel was sighted and battle would ensue.

One day his lieutenant asked him “captain, why do you always wear your red trouser to battle?”
To which the old ruffian replied “So that when I b...

What does a short sighted detective wear?

Suspectacles

Did you hear about the long-sighted baptist?

He had to use a large font.

Usain Bolt is very near-sighted, almost blind

The only reason he can run so fast is because he downgraded the graphics

Blind people earn more every week than a sighted person.

There's always little bumps in their salary.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Medical experts in Washington DC today were asked if it is time to ease the COVID lockdowns.

Allergists were in favor of scratching it, but dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves. Gastroenterologists had a sort of a gut feeling about it, but neurologists thought the government had a lot of nerve. Obstetricians felt certain everyone was laboring under a misconception, while optome...

Saw an accident on the highway today that made me feel like a short-sighted man in a strip club...

I couldn't see much but there was definitely a semi involved.

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