UPJOKE

She Said Yes Jokes

I proposed my Russian girlfriend and she said Yes!

For the wedding, my whole family and friends flew over to her home town of Moscow.

It was a beautiful ceremony, however I did find some things strange. For instance, the priest never said, "You may now kiss the bride", but I just assumed it was purely an American thing and didn't mind.
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I asked my girlfriend if she was ready for 12 inches of dick and she said yes.

I'm so excited for 12 rounds of sex tonight!

I asked my wife if I'm the only one she has ever been with. She said yes

All the others were nines and tens.

She said yes!

Unfortunately, the question was: "Would you like to press charges?"

I matched with a tinder profile that had no pics.

We chatted a bit. Smart and funny so i asked for a date. She said yes!

I'm not expecting much, probably 400lbs. But she answered the door, this little strawberry blomde with a head full of curls and all the right curves in all the right places. We exchanged our real names and i asked what sh...

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I saw my therapist today, and said "You are going to bring up my obsession with predicting the future, aren't you?" She said Yes.

I said "I knew it!!"

When I was in high school, I had a crush on a girl, so I asked her to the prom. She said yes.

I wanted to impress her and make her feel special, so I went to the Limosine rental place. But because it was prom season, the Limosine rental place was really busy, so the limo line was long. But I waited and waited, and eventually I booked the limo.

Next, I wanted a suit. Suits look classy....

A guy asked his crush to prom, and to his surprise, she said yes! The day before prom, he gets ready for the exciting day.

First, he goes to the tuxedo store to rent a tux, there was a huge line and he finally got the tux after 30 minutes. Next, he goes to the flower shop to buy a bouquet of flowers. There was an even longer line and he waited for 60 minutes to finally get the flowers. Finally, he went to the car shop t...

Saw a homeless woman and asked if I can take her home. She said yes

So I took her cardboard box

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I proposed a threesome to my wife. And she said yes.

So this weekend its going to be my stupid fucking ideas, the sofa and me.

Just asked a girl to marry me and she said Yes...

Though I think that her English was a bit off because she exactly said - I don’t no you.

I asked a pretty, young, homeless woman if I could take her home, and she said yes with a big smile.

The look on her face soon changed when I walked off with her cardboard box.

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A young man walks into a bar looking annoyed and sullen. "What's the matter, son?" asks an older patron.

The young man sighs.

"I have a girlfriend who's very nice and very pretty."

"So? What's the problem?"

"Actually, she's not just pretty. She's the most beautiful woman I've ever met in my life."

"That sounds great."

"Not only that, she also adores me and wants to b...

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Do you know how to have sex?

Man walks up to a farmers house, knocks on the door. When a woman opened the door, the man ask if she knew how to have sex. Not amused, she slammed the door. Again, the man knocked, again, asked the same question. Again, not amused, she screamed get the hell away. Later, she told her husband of the ...

I asked this lady if I could touch her hair

She said yes, so I ran my finger across her lip and that's how the fight started.

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