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Sandwich Shop Jokes

A homeless man approached me as I was leaving a sandwich shop…

… and he asked me if I had $5 to spare. I felt bad for him, and was just about to give him the money.

But then I realized I was holding a $5 foot long I had just bought, so I held up both the cash and the sandwich and told him he could have whichever one he preferred.

He stared at th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into a sandwich shop

He asks for a BLT on rye, pays for it and leaves. The next week he does the same and the week after that as well. Years go by and the man still comes for his weekly sandwich and is now a recognized face at the restaurant and is a friend of the owner.

One day the owner asks him, "Why don't yo...

Thinking about opening a bondage themed sandwich shop

Call that BLTDSM

Did you hear about that new heavy metal themed sandwich shop?

It's called Pantera Bread

Do you know why Indian sandwich shops keep opening?

Because there is always a New Delhi

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The submarine sandwich shop by my work had moved to a new location and was replaced with an adult sex shop.

I didn't realize it until one day I walked in and asked for a 12-inch salami on an Italian.

What do you call it when you linger too often at a Tibetan sandwich shop?

A daily dilli-dallie at the Dalai Deli.

I’ll show myself out now.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A boy dreams of one day working at his favorite sandwich shop.

And so, he asks the owner if he could see how the sandwiches are made. Delighted, the owner shows him how he grinds his own peanut butter, prepares his own pickles and even whips up his own mayonnaise. The boy is so excited that he blurts out his deepest wish--to see how the owner makes his signatu...

If you loiter in a Tibetan spiritual leaders sandwich shop every day, then...

... you dilly dally in the Dalai's deli daily.

I went into a sandwich shop and saw a lobster. It looked happy, so I asked it why and it replied;

"I'm on a roll!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into an eco-friendly sandwich shop.

He takes a few steps in and realizes that the place smells like shit. The man asks a lady sitting down what the smell is all about.

"This place uses cow manure to power the place. It smells bad, but it does help the ecosystem."

The man is confused, but since the place has good food r...

What did the nirvana fan say to the sandwich shop guy?

Make me one with everything.

Went to my local sandwich shop and asked for “a sub filled to the brim with cheese and baloney”

They just linked me to r/jokes

The server at the sandwich shop said that every sandwich comes with a free pickle.

I said, “That’s a really good dill.”

I tripped on the way to the sandwich shop near my house.

r/SubsYouFellFor

I recently opened a combination sandwich shop/mini golf course

I thought it was a good idea, but the reviews said the experience was sub-par

A Guy Walks into a Sandwich Shop

A guy walks into a sandwich shop on his lunch hour. There is no one behind the counter, so he has a bit more time than normal to look at the menu board. Trying to decide what he wants, he reads down the list:

Salami : $5
Roast beef: $4.50
Ham on Rye: $4.50
Hand Jobs: $5

Wait,...

An African-American woman walks into a sandwich shop

An African-American woman called Betty walks into a sandwich shop, and asks if they are serving pork sandwiches.

The man replies, "No Black Betty it's ham or lamb."

Guy at a sandwich shop (slightly NSFW)

A man driving down HWY 10 starts feeling hungry, when low & behold he sees a sandwich shop, so he pulls off to the side, and walks in. Upon entering he browses the menu: Steak Sandwich, Chicken Sandwich, Roast Beef Sandwich, and Handjobs. He looks behind the counter and the woman making sandwich...

I keep ordering things that aren’t on the menu at this Vietnamese Sandwich Shop...

The lady behind the counter said: “If you keep doing that you’re gonna get in trouble!”

I replied: “Whadya gonna do...Bahn Mi?!”

I went to a sandwich shop and ordered a pastrami sandwich, but I received a meatball marinara.

Whoops, wrong sub

Guy goes to a sandwich shop for a bite to eat

Walks in to the restaurant, and looks at the menu. After a minute he approaches the sandwich counter and asks the employee to make him the /r/jokes sandwich. The guy takes his sandwich to the table and sits down to eat. He takes a bite into it and immediately spits it out and says "this thing tastes...

What do they do when I'm being disruptive at the Vietnamese sandwich shop?

Banh mi.

What does a sandwich shop and an adult film casting agency have in common?

Both offer 6 and 12 inches in many varieties.

I want to open a sandwich shop in the new Islamic State

it will be called the infideli

Persian joke

Yesterday I was so hungry, I went to the sandwich shop and ordered Ham e Cheese.



....همه چيز means "every thing".
(first timer here, be gentle)

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