UPJOKE

Reptile Dysfunction Jokes

What's it called when a chameleon can't change its colors anymore?

A reptile dysfunction.

What do you call a lizard that doesn’t work?

A reptile dysfunction

Why did the alligator stop breeding turtles?

Because of a reptile dysfunction.

My pet snake just lays around and won't move

I think he's suffering from a reptile dysfunction

Saw a snake show today..

The handler was having a really hard time getting the giant anaconda out of the sack at first.

Then, after promising an impressive length, he had a hard time getting it to stretch out so that was a let down too.

Finally, the show finished about 45min earlier than promised.

He s...

Why did the female crocodile leave her husband?

He had a reptile dysfunction.

I went to the doctor because my trouser snake didn’t work.

He said I have a reptile dysfunction

A zookeeper couldn't get his snakes to breed

The vet said he had a reptile dysfunction

What do you call it when you have snakes in your pants?

E-Reptile Dysfunction

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The veterinarian gave my turtle Viagra

Apparently it had a reptile dysfunction.

If you had a robot lizard that wasn’t working properly…

…would that be eReptile Dysfunction?

What does a dinosaur who can't get hard have?

E-reptile dysfunction

What do you call it when a lizard loses its tail and it doesn’t grow back?

A-reptile dysfunction

What do you call a Chameleon that cant change colors?

A reptile dysfunction... [Bluechew review](https://www.thefate.org/bluechew-review/)

A lizard walks into the Doctors

He says to the Doctor, "I'm having trouble getting a stiffy"

The Doctor said "Don't worry i see this all the time you have a reptile dysfunction".

Why did the lizard's wife leave him?

He had a-reptile dysfunction.

Snake Charmer

An Indian Snake Charmer was having trouble getting his Cobra to stand up and dance for him. No matter how hard he played the Cobra just laid there limply. He finally called the vet and after the vet looked over the Cobra he informed the Snake Charmer that his Cobra was suffering from "a reptile dysf...

How do you call it when a turtle doesn't do what he's supposed to do?

Uh, reptile dysfunction.

Have you guys heard about the cobra who couldn't raise its head off the ground?

He had reptile dysfunction.

What do you call it when someone exhibits lizard-like tendencies?

A reptile dysfunction.

What do you call a couple of alligators with problems in the bedroom?

A reptile dysfunction.

Was at the vet last week....

Was at the vet last week and struck up a conversation with an older gent sitting next to me. A few mins into our conversation a green snake pokes its head out of his pocket and says "Woof!"

I looked with shock and asked his "What was that?"

He says 'oh, it's my pet snake'

'What...

What do you call it when the crocodiles start getting all wild at the zoo?

Reptile dysfunction

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A lizard went to the doctor complaining about his sex life

After hearing his story, the doctor told him,

You’ve got a reptile dysfunction

My battery powered dinosaur toy has stopped working.

I guess it just has a bad case of e-reptile dysfunction.

This weekend we saw a crocodile that had trouble swimming,

Does anyone know where we can find medication for a reptile dysfunction?

I saw a lizard with two tails

It was a case of reptile dysfunction

I was reading an article that said alligators aren't mating this summer

Scientists blamed it on reptile dysfunction

In a recent interview, Mark Zuckerburg's wife stated she wasn't bothered at all about being married to a lizard person.

But rather, she only took issue when Mark would drink heavily and behave erratically, calling it a reptile dysfunction.

Why was the lizard upset with her husband?

Because he had a reptile dysfunction. ...

Okay bye now

I’m starting a YouTube channel about my fixation with lizards and snakes. What am I going to call it?

A Reptile Dysfunction

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did the pet store owner feed his snakes viagra when they were stuck crawling backwards?

He thought they were suffering from a reptile dysfunction.

My friend has this really weird obsession with snakes, it's not right....

i think he has A Reptile Dysfunction

Know why online dating doesn't work for snakes?

e-reptile dysfunction.

Walking along a pond a heard a turtle ribbit

I guess you could say he has a reptile dysfunction

Paleontologists have determined that there once was a genetic mutation millions of years ago that resulted in the creation of a five-legged dinosaur.

As far as we know, this is the first evidence ever seen of a reptile dysfunction.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did the T-Rex get kicked outta the porn shoot?

Because he had a reptile dysfunction

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