UPJOKE

The term "Every 60 seconds in Africa..." is really stupid

Everyone knows Africans don't get seconds, they're lucky if they get a single serving.

A really stupid joke

What is a martial artist's favorite thing to drink

WATAH

What do you call a really stupid fish?

A dumb bass

This waitress asked me a really stupid question

She said, "how did you find your steak sir?"

I said, "well, I just looked next to the potatoes and there it was."

I think that music teachers are really stupid.

They can only count to like 4 and then they start trying to distract you with some music.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why is calling someone a pussy a really stupid way of calling someone weak?

Because pussies can take a hell of a pounding

A guy was in high school for 10 years. He must have been really stupid, but not as stupid as the guy who was there 20 years.

The longer you go to high school, the dumber you are. Thats why I never went.

Really stupid math joke

What do mathematicians confuse Halloween and Christmas?

Because Dec 25 = Oct 31

I asked my mom something really stupid.

I asked her to calm down.

I was watching Jurassic park the other day.....

.... when I thought "not only does my son have a really stupid name, he´s also a terrible driver"

Cop: So I’m writing you a ticket for driving alone in the car pool lane.

Me: You’re going to feel really stupid when you look in my trunk.

Arguing with strangers online is like wrestling sharks

Even if you win, it was a really stupid thing to do.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A friend of mine had a penis extension

Now his house looks really stupid

gangster humor

Did you hear about the really stupid gangster who gave testimony against a mob boss?
They had to put him in the witless protection program...

Two blondes are traveling in their motorhome.

At some point during the trip they get stuck when trying to drive under a low bridge. I have an idea says first, let the air out of the tires, so we might get loose! You are really stupid, says the second, it is at the top that we are stuck!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you get, when you cross a husky and a blondie?

Either a really stupid fucking dog, or a frost resistant bitch

Donald Trump and Mike Pence were talking when Trump. said, "I hate all the dumb jokes people tell about me."

Wise Old Pence, feeling sorry for his old boss, said sage-like, "Oh, they are only jokes. There are a lot of stupid people out there. Here, I'll prove it to you." Pence took Trump outside and hailed a taxi driver. "Please take me to Number One Observatory Circle in northwestern Washington to see if ...

An old woman was sitting next to her fire one day when suddenly a spark jumped out and turned into a fairy.

The fairy told the old woman she could have three wishes.

The old woman thinks for a while and then asks for the following:

1) she wants 10 million dollars

2) she wants to be 18 years old again

3) she wants her faithful tomcat, Tiger, to be turned into a healthy 19 year o...

On a train to a large computer convention, there were 3 software engineers and 3 managers...

Each of the managers had a train ticket. The group of engineers had only ONE ticket for all of them. The managers started laughing, figuring the engineers were going to get caught and thrown off the train.

When one of the engineers, the lookout, said, “Here comes the conductor,” all of the en...

"Shiffer Island reportely has the dumbest people in the world living on it."

"It's why when you do something really stupid they say 'You must have Shiffer brains'"

Johnny Carlson

One time when I was young...

One time when I was young I did something really stupid. So my mother started disciplining me. Only this time in particular, some music had started playing. I wanted to go turn it off, but she beat me to it.

Why can’t politicians do algebra? (A series of jokes)

Why can’t politicians do algebra?

They can’t solve the inequalities.

Why can’t politicians do algebra?

They’re afraid of the radicals.

Why can’t politicians do algebra?

They’re just really stupid.

Really busy century in heaven

Three guys die and go to heaven. St. Peter says "Listen - we're having a really busy century, so we need to manage admissions tightly. Right now we can only admit people who have died in horrible fashions, and those who have died in a more mundane way will have to wait in limbo, and it could take a ...

There was boy named Billy and he wasn't very smart

He lived with his mother in a small town. Nobody liked him because he was really stupid, least of all his school teacher who was always annoyed with him.

One day Billy's mother came to the school to learn how her son was doing. The teacher plainly told the mother that her son was a complete...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An elephant and a camel are chatting at a party

The elephant asks "Why do you have your tits on your back?"

"YOU KNOW FOR SOMEONE WHOSE DICK IS IN THEIR FACE THAT'S A REALLY STUPID QUESTION!"

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