UPJOKE

Reaction To Jokes

There have been countless people criticizing Donald Trump for his delayed reaction to the Novel Coronavirus

Probably could have gotten things going a lot quicker with a picturebook Coronavirus

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What was Hitler's reaction to Pearl Habor?

He did Nazi it coming

What was the dying tree's reaction to a 2nd chance to grow?

Re-leaf.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Reaction to Snakes

• Civilian: Runs away from the snake screaming.

• Paratrooper: Lands on and kills the snake.

• Armor: runs over snake, giggles, and looks for
more snakes.

• Infantry: "Look, a putty cat. Come 'ere
kitty....Ouch! Hey, that's not a putty tat."

• Army Aviation: Has GPS...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What was the woman's reaction to finding her husband's Viagra prescription?

She took it really hard.

Everyone knows the story of "doubting Thomas" and his reaction to the death and resurrection of Christ

He was famously known for insisting on seeing the wounds for himself, and while most think it was because he didn't believe the stories he was hearing, I know it was because he wanted to confirm that Jesus was indeed a holey man.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Breaking: Stormi Daniels reaction to president Trumps Syria decision.

Shocked Trump pulls out when he said he would

Have you heard Tom Holland's reaction to the end of Infinity War? ***Spoilers***

***Spoilers***
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
He was blown away by it!

After my friend died from an allergic reaction to peanuts,

I went to his funeral. Everyone got upset when I put an Epipen on his tombstone.

So I explained:

"It's what he would have wanted"

What was Trump's reaction to the petition for him to release his tax returns

Not my precedent

I have a shellfish allergy and I got an allergic reaction to it

So The Fine Brothers sued me

Define pregnancy

An ova reaction to sperm

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Penis jokes! A professor gives his physiology class a spot quiz...

A professor gives his physiology class a spot quiz. One question he asks is, "What part of the human anatomy expands to ten times its normal size during periods of intense emotion and excitement?" He picks a rather overdressed girl in the front row to answer it. "Miss Callahan!" The indicated girl, ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The children in Africa

When I was young and I wouldn’t eat my food, my mom would always tell me to think about the children in Africa and how they’re starving.

Being a good and impressionable kid, I really took her words to heart and made it an objective of mine to help these poor kids. Today I work as a volunteer...

Two priests go into the shower

In the shower they notice that there are no soap.

One of them says "Il go to my room and bring 2 soap bars" runs naked to the room, grabs 2 bars of soap and when he was running back...

3 nuns show up, first thing he remembers to do "freezes like a statue"..

Nuns look at the s...

Little Timmy saw his dad drive by...

It's a sunny day, and little Timmy was outside playing by himself, when he saw his dad drive by with Aunt Karen in the passenger seat. They drive off into the woods nearby, and little Timmy runs after them to see what's going on. Upon learning what it is dad and Aunt Karen is doing out in the woods ...

Men vs Women

One of the greatest differences between men and women is the reaction to the word "facial"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[Long] A boy is picking up his girlfriend for prom.

When he got to her house, the beans he ate for lunch beforehand were catching up to him and he began to have some gas. Her parents invited him in for dinner, and as he sat, he saw an opportunity: when the dog (named Fido) walked over to him, he would fart and it would seem like the dog did it. And j...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.