UPJOKE

Re Use Jokes

A neighbor overhears a husband and wife arguing. The wife yells “the only time you’re useful is when you’re on your back or hands and knees!”

The neighbor gasps, and then hears the husband say “I do more than fix the car and kitchen sink.”

My old doctor said he could tell if someone was infected with HIV with just a stethoscope...

Because they’re useful hearing AIDS

Why do vegetarians give good head?

Because they’re used to eating nuts.

It’s freezing in Florida, which means iguanas might start falling from trees. All the old people aren’t too worried about this though.

They’re used to a reptile dysfunction

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two young boys walked into a pharmacy, picked out a box of tampons and proceeded to the checkout counter.

The girl at the counter asked the older boy, “do you know what these are used for?”

The boy replied, “not exactly, but they’re not for me. They’re for him. He’s my brother. He’s four. We saw on TV that if you use these you would be able to swim and ride a bike. Right now, he can’t do either.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

4 gays walk into a bar

The gays walk into the bar and they’re having a good time, when all of a sudden they get tired from standing around and drinking all the time. One of the dudes goes “man I’m so tired of standing around I kinda wanna seat” another one goes “yeah me too I could sure use one”. The third friend manages...

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