UPJOKE

Picking Up The Phone Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. šŸ¤”

A woman, cranky because her husband was late coming home again, decided to leave a note, saying, "I've had enough and have left you. Don't bother coming after me.ā€

Then she hid under the bed to see his reaction.

After a short while, the husband comes home and she could hear him in the kitchen before he comes into the bedroom.

She could see him walk towards the dresser and pick up the note.

After a few minutes, he wrote something on it befo...

This joke may contain profanity. šŸ¤”

Tom, Dick, and Harry were in a bar

Talking through the late hours of the night into the morning. A little after midnight they got into an argument over the difference between irritation, anger, and frustration. Finally Tom bets the other two $50 that he can demonstrate that with just three phone calls. So they take the bet. They all ...

This joke may contain profanity. šŸ¤”

A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor....

A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor. The doctor asked her what had happened to her ears and she answered, "I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang - but instead of picking up the phone, I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear.""Oh Dear!" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief....

This joke may contain profanity. šŸ¤”

Father and Son

So there was this boy, about high school age

He didnā€™t have the best relationship with his father after his parents got divorced

On top of it, every time he tried to call his dad it took him forever to answer

He would callā€¦
No answer
Call againā€¦
No answer
But by ...

After Israel threatened to take the Security Council vote as an act of war, the New Zealand Ambassador called Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu....

...Picking up the phone, he spoke "Hebrew."

Blonde Burns

A blonde goes to the doctor with burns on both of her ears and her right hand. "Sit down and tell me how it happened," says the doctor. "I was ironing my clothes when I received a call. Instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and burned my ear." "'What about the other ear and your hand...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.