UPJOKE
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Reporter: Mr. President, will you be pardoning Turkey today?

President: Is Saudi okay?

Trump's 4th of July 'Salute to America' has bankrupted Washington D.C's Emergency Planning and Security Fund, which is used to provide police and security support at Presidential events.

This throws uncertainty on whether or not the President will be able to hold the annual Turkey Pardoning Ceremony this November, which is expected to feature a Presidential Pardon for Trump's close personal friend Jeffrey Epstein.

The White House just released a statement that...

Trump is only pardoning the white meat of the turkey this year.

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