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Paddy's Day Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

(Content NSFW) man walks into a bar on St. Paddy's day and gets tapped on the shoulder by a leprechaun.

A man walks into a bar on St. Paddy's day and gets tapped on the shoulder by a leprechaun. The man turned around and the leprechaun asks "how old are you?" The man replies "I am 29 years old." The leprechaun nodded then said "You have a family don't you?" The man repied "Yes, I have 2 kids and a...

An Irishman Came Home from the Pub on St. Paddy's Day...

and walked into his house and laid a 30 lb. turkey on the table. His wife looks wide-eyed and asked, "Liam, where'd ya get the tarkey?"

"Well Mary, all the fella's at the pub had a little contest for St. Paddy's Day. The fella with the biggest member won the tarkey."

Mary turned ghostl...

St. Paddy's day.

Paddy's wife had watched a cooking show on the telly and was dying to try out the recipe, so she sent him out to Sean's market to buy escargot and told him not to stop by the pub on the way home.

Well, Paddy being Paddy, he decided to pop in for a pint anyways. A quick pint became several. H...

Happy Paddy's Day lads and lasses

Irish chat up line:
Have ya got any Irish in ya?
I don't.
Well would ya like some?

What's the difference between St Patrick's Day and Martin Luther King Day?

On St. Paddy's Day, everyone pretends to be Irish.

I asked my boss

I asked my new boss why she wasn't wearing any green today. She told me she didn't feel right celebrating St. Paddy's day since she didn't have an Irish bone in her body. I asked her if she wanted one.

Know anyone hiring?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's in a name?

It's St. Paddy's Day in a small Irish town. Everyone is celebrating and laughing, as happy as they can be. Except for one man, alone in a pub, face in is hands. The bartender, seeing his distress, walks down and says, "What's the matter, lad? It's St. Paddy's Day, everyone in Ireland should be celeb...

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