For the golfers: if you get caught in a thunderstorm on the golf course, grab your one iron and hold it up over your head.
Not even God can hit a one iron.
May your glass be ever full. May the roof over your head be always strong.
And may you be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows you're dead.
If a joke's over your head it's a "whoosh". But if a joke crashes and dies horribly,
That's a "Boeing".
Did you know you can fit any boat over your head like a hat, if you just flip it over?
That's how you make it cap-sized...
If you start going bald, get rabbits tattooed all over your head.
Until you get up close they look just like hares.
What's more fun than swinging an infant over your head with a rope as fast as you can?
Stopping it with a shovel
I was going to write a joke about your lack of stature...
...but it would probably just go over your head.
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