UPJOKE

One Out Jokes

Which one is the odd one out; a Crab, a Tuna, a Chinese man run over by a bus or a Lobster?

A tuna, because the rest of them are crustaceans.

odd one out.

Which is the odd one out.?

a pound of beef mince.

a pound of soya mince,

or a vibrator.?

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.

.

.

.

.

.Answer the beef mince, the other two are meat substitutes.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Statistically, one out of 10 of your friends is gay.

I think it might be Steve, he's really sexy.

Studies show one out of every 3 people is a murderer.

It’s not me, it’s not you… oh, what about that guy behind you?

What’s the odd one out?

A. Flour
B. Yeast
C. Royalty
D. Meat

D. Meat because it’s usually not “in bread.”

One night four college students were out partying late

One night four college students were out partying late night and didn’t study for the test which was scheduled for the next day.

In the morning, they thought of a plan. They made themselves look dirty with grease and dirt. Then they went to the teacher and said they had gone out to a weddi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was attacked by three men last night. I managed to knock one out.

Probably wasn't the best time to have a wank but I thought fuck it, it might be the last chance I get.

Check this one out:

**1**

How do i rub one out in my pants?

its a subtle art and i cant seem to grasp it

My math-oriented co-worker just broke this one out

A man stumbles upon a frog while walking home. While looking at the frog, it starts to speak to him.

"Hello!", it says, "If you kiss me, I will turn into a beautiful woman!"

The man smiles, puts the frog into his pocket and continues on his way. A few hours later, he hears the voice of...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Check this one out (I half made this up)

A boy in middle school is having his first sex ed class and he's learning about safe sex. The teachers says he's going to demonstrate how to put on a condom using a banana. The boy learns a lot, so when he goes home he tells him mom what he learned. His mom responds:

"He put a banana peel on ...

They say one out of every seven friends has a gambling addiction.

My money is on Jimmy.

One out of 3 people is addicted to drugs.

Look at the person on your left. Now look at the person on your right. Chances are one of them has some drugs to share with you.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three guys picked a fight with me in a bar last night. I managed to knock one out.

Sure, it was a strange time to masturbate, but I didn't know if I was going to survive.

Why did the man rub one out?

Because he realised the answer to his test question was actually two.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Hitler, one out of ten how much does your art suck?

NEIN!!!!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

One out of every ten people lives next to a pedophile...

...not me, I live next to two beautiful 8 year olds.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Pick the odd one out...

Pick the odd one out: eggs, meat, wife, blowjob.

You can beat your eggs, you can beat your meat, you can beat your wife, but you can't beat a blow job

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