Boebert asked her coworker, "Do you have any kids?" "Yes," she replied. "I have one child that's just under two."
Then Boebert said, "I might be stupid, but I know how many one is."
Having one child makes you a parent...
Having two makes you a referee.
So I was teaching a church Sunday school class this morning and asked the kids what they know about resurrection. Only one child raised her hand and said...
***"I don't know what it is but I know that if it lasts for more than four hours then you should call a doctor"***
A blind clown is asked to perform at a children’s hospital. He is led into the amputee ward and begins with some jokes, but not one child laughs.
“A song, perhaps,” he thinks. “That’ll cheer ‘em up!” “Ifffffff you’re happy and you know it....”
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Oh, how nice (A joke from my 96 year old great-grandmother-in-law)
Two women are in the hospital. Their labor has started, but not progressed enough for delivery, so they are in a room waiting together.
"Is this your first child?" says the older woman.
"No," says the younger woman. "I have another."
"I have three." Continues the older woman. "A...
An old man has been standing in line at the pearly gates for so long, when he gets to the front, he can't remember his name for St. Peter to look up in the Big Book...
Peter doesn't know what to do, so he gets Jesus to help him figure it out.
Jesus says "Tell us about your life, maybe that will jog your memory."
The old man says "Well, I only had one child, a son."
Jesus smiles and says "Heh, I was an only child too. Go on."
The man say...
At school the teacher tells the students:
- Children, you have to write an essay that ends with the sentence "Mother, there is only one".
One child presents his essay about the time his mother saved his puppy from being run over and killed: "And that's why I say that mother, there is only one".
Another child presents his essay...
What is worse than two children in a trash bin?
One child in two trash bins.
There was a man who wasn’t creative
He named his kids numbers in the order they were born (the first child was 1, second child 2 and so on)
After he had 100 kids , a fire burned his house down leaving only one child. 90
90 grew up and had his own kids that weren’t creative and when they saw a stray dog , they took him in...
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