Older Than Me Jokes

I said it must be because he has the better dentist.

According to the Bible, Noah built an ark and brought a pair of each animals on board to survive a flood. When the ark ran aground Noah told the animals to go forth and multiply.

The snakes told Noah “We can’t multiply, we’re adders.”

Noah gathered some driftwood tree trunks and ... read more

Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, "How old was your husband?" "98," she replied. "Two years older than me." "So you're 96," the undertaker commented. She responded, "Hardly worth going home is it?"

I am 17 years old and pregnant with my new boyfriend,

who is 20 years older than me, he is married with 3 kids.

He is a drug dealer, carries a gun and is just out of prison.

How do I tell my parents he supports Manchester United.??

A father passing by his teenage son's bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was neat and tidy.


Then he saw an envelope propped up
prominently on the center of the pillow.

It was addressed "Dad".
With the worst premonition,
he opened the env... read more

A father walks past his son's room and to his astonishment he sees that the bed is neatly made and the room is all tidied up.

Then he saw an envelope on the pillow.

It's addressed to "Dad".

He picked it up, tore it open and read the note:

"Dear Dad, it is with great regre... read more