Three friends stranded on a deserted island find a magic lamp. Inside it is a genie who agrees to grant each friend one wish.
1st Friend: Genie i want to go home back.
Genie grants his wish.
Second Friend: I also want to go back my home.
Genie grants his wish too.
Third Friend: I have nowhere to go , I am alone , I have no home, I want my both friends to be here with me.
A horse is sitting at home, watching MTV...
He's watching a heavy metal music video, and the guitarist plays an amazing solo. The horse says "that looks amazing, I want to do that!"
The horse goes to the phone book, looks up a music teacher and calls him. "Hi, I'd like to learn to play guitar." Says the horse.
"Sure," says the m...
Why was everyone sad at the atheist’s funeral?
He was all dressed up with nowhere to go!
Final Destination
What do you call an open-casket viewing at an atheist's funeral? All dressed up and nowhere to go.
Name’s Juan
Names Juan. A few years ago I’d been living with my girlfriend in her apartment. I’ve been into video games since I was a kid and never took a real interest in learning practical things like how to hit a nail with a hammer. Girlfriend and I met in college and since graduating and moving in together ...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
A man walking down the beach heard a woman crying... (NSFW)
He walks down to investigate. At he gets closer he sees it's the outline of a blonde woman sitting in a beach chair near the water. He walks up behind her about to ask her what the matter was. Before he says anything, he notices that she doesn't have any arms or legs. Thinking it's a bit weird, he s...
funniest joke you'll hear today about congestive heart failure
Assuming you are healthy, your heart when working normally, acts, sort of like a pump, or rather, two pumps. You see, your right heart expands to draw deoxygenated blood in from the body, and contracts to pump it out to the lungs to become oxygenated. And at the same time, your left heart draws in o...
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