UPJOKE
saidtellashley

Yo mumma’s so fat

The ocean beaches on her.

Your mumma’s so fat

Thanos had to snap twice

What did the komodo dragon mumma say to her hatchling?

You were a snaccident!

Your mumma so fat.

Its not a joke. im just stating facts

What did baby corn say to mumma corn?

Where's popcorn?

“Leroy, sit down!”

A woman walks into the downtown welfare office, trailed by 15 kids... "WOW," the social worker exclaims, "Are they ALL YOURS???" "Yep they are all mine," the flustered mumma sighs, having heard that question a thousand times before. She says, "Sit down Leroy. All the children rush to find seats.
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy goes to prison and is shown to his cell...

... His cellmate is a huge Tongan bloke, 6"4", 300kg who takes up 2/3 of the cell on his own.

The Tongan cellmate says "My names Bubba, in Bubba's cell we play mumma and daddy. You choose who you want to be."

The guy thinking to make the best of a bad situation says "I guess I'll be da...

Around 50 million years ago, whales lived on land. Until some of them decided to go back to the sea.

The rest of them stayed on land and became yo mumma

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Properly offensive mum jokes?

My friend and I had a habit of mum jokes duelling and putting standard 'yo mumma' to shame. All to the spirit of pushing the boundary. One point I came up with this:

'Your mum so loose, when you were born, it felt so good that she used you as a dildo and pushed you right back in.'

Anyo...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

We are getting there

A man walks into the bathroom and takes his position at the urinal. He is joined by a 6ft tall black man.

Going about his business he accidentally looks over and is amazed at the size of his neighbours johnson.

Both men go to wash their hands and the first man leans over and says. "Tel...

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