UPJOKE

As a musician, people asked me what my secret was to moving on from my ex so quickly.

I told them I just did what any good songwriter would do.

Drugs.
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Why do mathematicians have a hard time moving on in relationships?

Because they're always trying to find the x.

They don't know y, either.
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Moving On (Original joke)

It's been tough with my wife gone. It took me a while but I decided it was time to give her a proper burial, and move on. She put up on hell of a fight but eventually I got her in the coffin.
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My ex is having a really hard time moving on

From what I can tell through his blinds, he is currently eating (something we always did).
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Moving on!

I say Inertia is a bad thing... don’t let it slow you down!
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A bloke starts his new job at the zoo and is given three tasks…

First is to clear the exotic fish pool of weeds. As he does this a huge fish jumps out and bites him. To show who is boss, he beats it to death with a spade. Realising his employer won't be best pleased he disposes of the fish by feeding it to the lions, as lions will eat anything.

Moving ...
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Scotsman,

A Scotsman, on the way home from a heavy drinking session
with his mates, collapses onto a park bench and falls into a
very deep stupor. Some time later 2 girls walk past and on
seeing him debate whether he has anything under his kilt.
They decide to look and discover he’s stark naked....

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