UPJOKE

A blonde girl excitedly arrives home from school.

“Mommy Mommy, all the other kids can only count to 4, but I counted all the way to 10! Is it because I'm blonde Mommy?”

“Yes dear, it’s because you’re blonde.”

The girl returns home the following day even more ecstatic.

“Mommy mommy! When we dressed for gym class, all the oth...

Mommy Mommy, I'm tired of walking in circles

Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the floor.

Mean mommy joke my mom used to tell me

“Mommy mommy I’m tired of running in circles!”

“Shut up or I’ll nail your other foot to the floor!”

A blonde girl called Jenny came skipping home after school.

"Mommy mommy! Today in school, everyone else only counted to 5, but I counted to 10!"

The mom replies, "That's great honey!"

Jenny then asks, "Is it because I'm blonde?"

"Yes sweetie" says the mom.

The next day, Jenny comes home skipping and calling out "Mommy mommy! To...

Mommy mommy I wanna grow up to be a conspiracy theorist!

Prove it

MOMMY MOMMY, I DONT WANT TO VISIT GRAMPA!

Shut up and keep digging...

Mommy mommy! Daddy hanged himself in the living room!

*mom rushes to the living room*

Kid: Haha! April fools! He did it in the attic!

Mommy Mommy (SA joke)

Why is Daddy hanging in the cupboard?
Shut up, and eat your biltong.

"Mommy mommy in school the kids call me shampoo"

"Come on Johnson no more tears"

Mommy mommy, in school they all call me liar!

Aww my Timmy, you're not in school yet.

Jimmy: "mommy mommy, at school they tell me that I don't pay attention to detail..."

woman: "jimmy, your house is two doors down"
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