UPJOKE

Mentally Unstable Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm sorry Mickey, I'm afraid I can't grant you divorce on the grounds that Minnie is mentally unstable...

"Mentally unstable?! I said she's Goofy!"

Scientists have recently discovered the existence of a mentally unstable microscopic parasite on the moon...

Apparently it's a real lunatic

So I'm already kind of mentally unstable and my girlfriend just told me that she's pregnant.

I think I'm having a zygotic episode.

At our world famous clinic, many worried, afflicted and mentally unstable people come for assistance. I know it may sound ridiculous, but we start by suggesting they try one of our brain transplant procedures.

They always reject the offer at first, but eventually we change their minds.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Sh!t, shut up and manners

There were three women, they were very high when they were giving birth to their children so of course the names would’ve been weird the first mother named her Child and the other mother named her Child shut up and the other mother named her Child manners.

One day 20 years later , sh...

The one about the mental patients and the baseball game

There once was a doctor at a mental hospital, who had to take care of the craziest and most mentally unstable patients in the hospital, which they called the "nuts." The doctor, along with his assistant, would soon get through a breakthrough by giving them simple orders and addressing them as "nuts....

R.I.P Bob

Bob was a bus conductor--driver. He had been going through rough times, with his wife leaving him for his best friend. One day on the job, he saw a young woman, probably in her early 20's signalling for the bus. Bob couldn't hold his rage in anymore and vented his frustration on the pedal, killin...

You may have heard on the news about a southern Californian man...

Who was put under 72 hour psychiatric observation when it was found that he owned 100 guns and allegedly had 100,000 rounds of ammo stored in his home.

My favorite quote from the dimwit tv reporter:"Wow! He has a quarter million machine gun bullets." The headline referred to it as a "massive...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An Old Joke

The year is 2120, and our story follows Joe McFlinch and his journey to overcome his inner demons. 'Who is Joe?', you may be wondering. Well, Joe is a cowardly 29 year old male. He has no special talents or skills, no hobbies, and most sadly, no friends. If I were to describe him as a dish, he would...

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