Mama So Fat Jokes

It’s usually of the tectonic variety.

Yo mama so fat she has her own gravity

But she so ugly people are still repelled by her

She went skydiving and got stuck.

The only scale she could use is the Richter Scale

My phone ran out of space.

I swerved my car to avoid hitting her and ran out of gas.

when she eats Taco Bell, she gets the walks.

She has a watch for every time zone she's in,
When she walks past the tv, you miss 8 seasons,
She beat galactus in a planet-eating contest,
Thanos couldn't snap her out of existence,
Flash died before he could do a lap around her
And she ate a black hole because she was hungry

she outta breath from taking the escalator.

When she takes a bath she doesn't use any water and it still overflows!

When she fell I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up

She uses Macrowave instead of microvave.

She ate her laptop because the website said it had cookies in it.

Every time she's about to jump in the pool God says: "Noah, get the boat NOW"

Just thinking about her in my head I broke my neck

When she hauls ass, she has to make two trips.


Gimme your best yo mama jokes.

When she misses a meal the stock market drops

When she stepped on the scale, it said one at a time please.

Because of Gravitational Lensing.

The earth was actually flat until they buried her.

...she had an heart attack while running an app.

her carbon footprint turned to diamond.

Einstein did a separate theory for her.

That when she went to [insert foreign country] she became [home country]’s largest export

The whole internet burped.

When she needs furniture she goes to a blacksmith.

I'm not laughing but the floor is cracking up

Ed Sheeran had a seizure trying to describe the shape of her

I accidentally ran a marathon while trying to pass her on the street

When she took her pants to the dry cleaners the lady said, "we don't do curtains."

If she were in Star Wars she would be Admiral Snackbar

>!We’re genuinely worried about her. That kind of lifestyle is unhealthy. You should encourage her to walk more and lay off the Ben&Jerry’s.!<

She can't store files larger than 4 GB.

it took Nationwide 3 years to get on her side.

When i was watching the simpsons and she walked past the Tv, I missed a whole SEASON

That when her underwear got dirty and she went to the laundromat, they told her that they don’t accept parachutes

When she stubs her toe, her forehead ripples.

She can tip the scales without touching them because her weight is AoE

I took a picture of her last year and it's still printing

But we shouldn't talk about the elephant in the room.

... she gave her memory-foam mattress to Goodwill and they sold it as a flying saucer.

She went to the beach and the lifeguard said “madam, could you please leave the beach, the tides waiting to come in”

When she wears heels she finds oil

1 photo of her takes more space than your "homework folder"

NTFS refuses to run on her system