UPJOKE

Make Tea Jokes

How does Moses make tea?

He brews

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do vampires use to make tea?

Used tampons

How do Americans make tea?

By throwing it in the harbour.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A fella goes to a building site to see if there are any jobs going.

"Maybe," says the foreman. "Can you make tea?"

"Sure," says the fella, "I can make tea like a pro."

"Okay," says the foreman, "can you drive a forklift?"

"Fuck me!" says the fella, "how big is the teapot?!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

This is an old joke but my husband told me to never tell it again!

3 vampires walk into a bar. The first one orders a Bloody Mary. The second orders a Bloody Mary. The bartender turns to the third and asks “a Bloody Mary?”

The vampire shakes his head. “Hot water for me”

“Hot water?”

“I found a tampon out back and want to make tea”

It's actually quite hard to learn how to make tea...

There's a *steep* learning curve.

Best January Joke I heard so far

Yesterday my friends dropped by my place without warning for a cup of tea.
The wife pulled me aside & said, "There's no sugar in the house, how can I serve tea?"
I winked at her & said, "Make tea without sugar for all, leave the rest to me."

As soon as the tea was served then i...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Muslim, Jewish and Christian man

A Christian, a Muslim and a jew are sitting in an apartment chatting. They then decide they want to make tea. The Christian and The Muslim are arguing over who should make it. After a while of going back and forth they look over to the Jew and say:

‘Hey, why doesn’t he brew’

Tea Party

A dad was staying home with his 3 year old daughter while his wife was away to see family. The daughter, having recently gotten a tea set for her birthday, found it enjoyable to 'make tea' for her father. The tea being water. Each day the little girl would bring her father his 'tea' while he watched...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.